It's Her and I
by HikariFate
Summary: Sadness, passion, romance, joy, laughter, loneliness, a hurricane of emotions begins. Fate and Nanoha confused by an impossible love between them.
1. Chapter 1

This is the translated version of "Es Ella y Yo" by **Tachiandneko**, the whole story belongs to him/her.

**A/N: **Hi everyone I'm back with this new story, that i hope you like. I only wanna let you know some things about this story. First, I really didn't get permission to translate it, is not that I didn't ask for it, I didn't but never got an answer. Second, it is rated M, just in case you didn't notice. And third, this story is completely different from the other one I did before, I think this one is more of a "real life situation" so there's no fantasy in it, but there's a lot of drama and many other thing you'll find out about when you read it. Also sorry if the chapter is a little long :)

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing from MGLN.

* * *

It's Her and I

It's been a month since Nanoha Takamachi and Fate Testarossa work together, however, their treatment has remained strictly professional.

For Nanoha, it was a total mystery the seriousness of Fate, she couldn't say that she had tried to treat her bad or indifferent, it simply was that she avoided engaging in any conversation that had no relation to work and no matter how much she tried to break the ice, Fate would always find a way to cool things again.

Nanoha has always been known for being very outgoing and playful. It wasn't that she liked to be the focus of everything, but she just liked to share things with people around her and be happy and dynamic, that's why she sought that her co-workers were a bit more than just part time company. This characteristic was what made it harder for her to overlook the failure of breaking the ice with Fate, being the person with whom she shared the office every day until 5:00 pm, it seemed absurd that they could not yet speak of nothing else that wasn't work.

From the first day she entered the office she noticed how good of a professional she was, Fate had proved to be very creative and detail in her work just like Nanoha, so in that sense they were complemented very well. But personally, everything could be summed up in that there was no relationship.

At first she thought that if Fate didn't want to associate with anyone in the office, including her, she must have her reasons and that perhaps it was best to leave things as they were, but each passing day the doubts of whether all of that behavior was due to something she had said or done invaded her, so that day, she decided that it was time to ask Fate.

"Fate"

"Umm?" she replied without looking up from her computer.

Their desks were next to each other, so Nanoha could see that Fate was very focused on her work.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure" she quietly replied.

For a moment she doubted if the time was right or not, but she thought it was best to do it once and for all.

"Have I done something to upset you?"

"What?" at that moment Fate turned to her with a frown as a sign of not understanding the question.

"Have I done or say something to upset you?"

"No…" she shook her head. "Why do you ask?"

"Well it's because… we already have a month working together and no matter how much I tried to get close to you, well… you always avoid it, so I thought that… I don't know… maybe it's because of me?" she said doubtfully.

Fate looked at her for a moment before answering. She hadn't realized that in her eagerness to go unnoticed she was giving a wrong idea to her partner.

"No Nanoha, it's not that." she told her a little embarrassed. "It's just that I'm not very good at that thing of being friendly. I'm sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable."

Fate had enough reasons for not wanting to get involved with anyone at work, a bad experience in her previous work had shown her that co-workers were just that, co-workers, trying something else, was like giving them permission to engage in her private life, to talk or even judge about it, so she would rather pretend that she wasn't good interacting with others. She had always been shy, but that hadn't prevented her from interacting with others. That frivolous attitude towards others was simply her choice. But she had to admit that Nanoha seemed to be different from the others, and in more than one occasion she was tempted to give her and give herself a chance to know each other, however, recalling her recent bad experience, made her forget that idea. But now, hearing the concerns of Nanoha, she felt that she had to put her guard down a little, after all, talking or being nice to her didn't mean to widely open the pages of her life.

"It's okay." Nanoha slightly smiled. "It's just that I wanted to be sure I wasn't the cause of your distance with me."

"You're not. In fact… I like working with you." I confessed, taking a more relaxed position in her chair.

Nanoha couldn't help to be surprise. While it is true that so far, they had agreed on opinions, points of views and decisions, she always thought that for Fate, working with her was more of an obligation than something pleasurable.

"Really? You're not saying it for obligation?" she inquired with a look that made Fate smile as well.

"Really. I find it easy to work with you. Also…" she diverted her look a little as if thinking of what she would say.

"Yes?" she said when she noticed that Fate didn't continue.

"You're very clever and witty." She said emphasizing the last word when remembering Nanoha's last prank. She put salt in the pot of sugar that is used by everyone in the office.

"Yes well…" she said blushing and laughing at the same time. "…I've always been like that, though I have improved over time, believe me."

Fate opened her eyes a little more when trying to imagine how she could have been before, but by doing so she couldn't help joining Nanoha in her laughter.

"But relax I won't do anything to you, I swear." she said raising her hand in the form of oath.

"I hope so" she said raising an eyebrow but amused.

"I don't want to abuse of my luck but…" she said after a little pause. "…want to have lunch together today?"

"Here?" she asked referring to the cafeteria of the company.

"Yes. Well, if you don't mind of course." when seeing her expression not very convinced, Nanoha was quick to talk. "We can also go elsewhere if you prefer."

Fate wasn't sure whether to accept the invitation or not, she knew that if she crossed that line, it was very possible that later she could not retract, but deep down, she needed to feel more comfortable in the office and if she kept on with the plan of not getting involved with anyone, she wouldn't make it, so she agreed.

They went to a restaurant of Italian food that was two blocks away. They had to wait for a bit before they were attended since the place was packed, but once they sat down and ordered, Nanoha took the initiative and began the conversation.

"And tell me, do you know the city?"

"Yes. I lived here in Europe most of my life, I only left for a couple of years."

"Ah ok, I thought you were new here." Fate came from working in a well known advertising agency in the media. "The agency where you come from is very good."

"Yes it is." She confirmed.

"When I heard you were coming from there, I couldn't believe it." she said after the waiter left the two drinks on the table. "And when I heard that you quit, much less."

Fate's eyes darkened and her face instantly became strained to the point that she tried to hide it by drinking some juice. Nanoha felt the change.

"I'm sorry, did I say something wrong?"

"No, nothing." she tried to smile, but it was more a grimace than a smile. "The agency is excellent, I have no complaints."

"So then why…?" she left the question open to see if Fate answered.

"Let's say that I had to choose between my job stability and my mental health." She knew she was giving more information than she should, but it was better to answer some questions before increasing the questioning.

"Well." she said surprised. "Been like that, you had no more options, right?"

"Yeah… it was really hard for me to leave, but ultimately, work I can find elsewhere. So I decided to return to my city."

"Sure, I understand"

Nanoha knew she had touched a sensitive spot in Fate's life, so she decided not to touch the subject anymore. She didn't want Fate to think of her as a meddler.

"And are you from here?" Fate asked.

"Me?... the truth is that I can no longer say I'm from somewhere in particular. I've traveled so much since childhood that I lost the sense of belonging somewhere."

"How is that?" she asked a bit surprised by her response.

"My father was a soldier in Japan, so it depended on where he was moved every two years or so. That lasted until the university stage, because I went to study in Madrid since we where around there. I think that was the most stable period I had." she said with blank eyes. "There I met my husband, but for that I have an excuse since you probably think that I married very young… I married him so that my father could get a higher position and that there was less changes of countries, cities and houses, besides that for my mother it was a nuisance and in the process for me too. He is a professional pilot, initially he worked for a commercial airline, but then he was hired in a private company. A year ago, one of the owners of the company proposed to him the job of only working for him, but on the condition of changing city every time he needed to do so, so my stay in Madrid didn't last long, of course he assured him a home wherever he arrived at, so that's why we ended here."

"Wow… it's been a lot of moving, right?"

"Yes, at first I found it fun to travel regularly, but over the years it has become more difficult and annoying" she made a pause. "I guess I'm starting to miss having a single household." she said wistfully. "I'm a little tired of having to adapt to a new town, new colleagues, not having someone to talk to…" she shook her head slightly, realizing that she was burdening Fate with her problems. "I'm sorry, I think I'm talking too much."

Fate remained silent for a few minutes. In that moment she realized that Nanoha's way of being, so outgoing and joking was nothing but a mask that hid her need to belong somewhere, which her made think even more, that it wasn't fair to make her pay for things in her past.

"Don't worry, we all need to talk with someone from time to time." she smiled reassuringly.

"Yes, well, the problem is that when I start, usually I find it hard to stop."

They both laughed. Since then the treatment between each other became more pleasant. Gradually they realized how much they had in common, the love for movies, the passion for bowling, the need to go shopping when they felt depressed or when the hormones were present, having older siblings… details that made it possible for Fate to feel more comfortable with her decision.

* * *

Arf her friend for years and roommate, had noticed the change in mood and looks that Fate had experienced. It wasn't much what she could see, because of a matter of hours, when Arf arrived Fate was sleep or was about to go to bed, so it was very little what they could share. However, for her that change was noticeable, what intrigued her the most was what had caused it.

On Friday like any other, when Fate arrived at her apartment, she was surprised to find Arf sitting on the couch watching TV and eating pizza. It was a great surprise, giving that Arf was one of those who didn't get home until early Saturday morning or even, she could arrive on Sunday.

"Hey!" she greeted upon entering.

"Hey!" she said through clenched teeth since she had a bite of pizza in her mouth.

Fate put her jacket on the mini closet that was behind the front door and walked into the kitchen for a glass of water.

"Here's pizza, if you haven't eaten yet."

"Yes, thanks. The truth is that I'm starving."

Fate took a plate from the cabinet and sat down next to Arf. She took two slices of pizza and began to eat.

"And how come you're home today?" asked Fate.

"Well, it's nothing in particular. I just didn't feel like going out today."

"Are you feeling ok?" she said incredulously.

Arf looked at her and laughed before answering.

"Yes, I feel fine… really, I just didn't feel like going out, that's all."

"Ok" she shrugged.

They stayed silent for a while as they ate and then the series went to commercials.

"And you?" Arf asked her.

"What about me?"

"What happened to you? Lately you don't arrive earlier than 8 pm."

Fate was surprised with that. It was true that since she spend time with Nanoha, it was rare for her to arrive at 5:30 like she used to, but the strange thing was that Arf knew, since she always arrives after 9, so she didn't know how she was aware of the change in her time of arrival.

"And how do you know that?"

"I have my contacts." she said suppressing a smile.

"Could it be that your contact is called Mrs. Lindy?"

"Whaaaaat? That's impossible." she said in an exaggerated manner.

Fate couldn't help to laugh. Mrs. Lindy was a middle-aged woman who works as the caretaker of the building since young. She knew everyone who lived there, temporarily or permanently, at what time they arrive or leave and who were the frequent visitors.

"I didn't know that Mrs. Lindy was so aware of me"

"To be fair to her, I actually told her to watch over you. She didn't give the information as a gossip but because I asked for it." she confessed.

"Yeah. And wasn't it better to ask me directly?"

"Well yes, but I didn't want to be tiresome" she made a pause. "Then… are you going to tell what caused the change? Or who?"

"Hahaha, can't it simply be that I wanted to change?"

"I don't think so. And with that laughter, much less. Come on, tell me what happened."

Fate thought for a few seconds before speaking. She told her about the conversation she had with Nanoha and how bad she felt when she realized that somehow she was punishing her for something that she had nothing to do with, that's why she had decided to leave behind her antisocial attitude. On the other hand, she also told her that due to the absence of her husband, Nanoha always tried to make up something to do to avoid having to go to her empty house, but that night, her husband had come early, so it was "home night", as they had named it.

"Wow! You seem like the most intimate friends, right?" Arf said with a tone of reproach. "One of these days you're going to tell that you're moving with her to keep her company."

"Hahaha, Not so much, don't exaggerate."

"Exaggerate! Since you arrived here, three months ago, I've tried to get you out, to get distracted and all I got were negatives. But then a red hair stranger comes, as you told me, cries a little and says she is alone and without a stable home and immediately puff! Like daisies you come out of your confinement." She took a deep breath before continuing. "I'm happy for you, really. I'm just sad that it was a stranger who achieved that change on you."

Fate stared at her for a moment. Arf was not the "jealous friend" type, but she knew that somehow the fact of not having accepted her help in those days had hurt her. Since they met, they have been very close and there was no doubt that she would always be there when needed, but at that particular time, Fate needed something else, another atmosphere, and going out with Arf didn't help her. She hadn't told her that, but it was time to do so.

"Arf… I know you've tried to help me and I really appreciate it. You don't how much. But right now, Nanoha represent a parenthesis in my life, a pause to the disappointment, the anger and the… humiliation I lived. That's why I go out with her, that's why listening to her problems, her worries, her anxieties and her jokes are like a balm of forgetfulness. It prevents me from thinking and remembering, even if it's only for a few hours, everything that happened… it makes me forget it."

"We can also do that, Fate." Arf and her friends Hayate, Vita, Reinforce, Shamal and Signum, had talked several times about the one thousand and one strategies to help Fate overcome what happened in previous months.

"I know. The problem is that now, I even want to forget about who I am and with you guys, I can't do that."

"Forget about who you are?" she asked frowning. She didn't know exactly what she meant.

"Yes, Arf, forget who I am."

"You don't have to do that Fate. You have nothing to be ashamed of, you know it right?" she told her after a few moments.

Fate's silence answered her.

"Fate, listen carefully to what I'm going to tell you. What happened was horrible, yes, but by no means you have to feel ashamed of it. It's not your fault that your mother wanted to cover up your homosexuality accusing you of being a sexual crazy person. It's not your fault that she was so coward and selfish as to prefer destroying your reputation and your image just so that no one discovered the truth. It's not your fault that everyone in the company let themselves to be entangled in her lies. So no Fate, YOU HAVE NOTHING TO BE ASHAMED OF, NOTHING!"

The last words were said with such intensity and inflection that Fate couldn't help to keep her eyes from filling with tears. How many times had she repeated herself the same thing without success to believe it?

Fate hugged Arf. She had never liked to show that weakness to anyone, but at that moment the emotions surpassed her and she couldn't help to seek support on her. For countless nights since returning there, she had quietly cried in her room trying to get rid of the frustration she felt for what had happened to her, but apparently that wasn't enough. Just the mere fact of talking about it made her body and mind intimately revive every infernal moment of what had happened. After crying uncontrollably for several long minutes, the sobs were subsiding until they stopped.

Arf offered her a napkin to wipe her face. They stayed silent for some time before Fate broke the silence.

"I was so stupid Arf… that's what infuriates me the most. I made myself fall into the speech of 'I'll make her change', 'The love between mother and daughter will be enough to make her accept me'… it's… it's something I don't forgive myself for." she said this last words looking into her eyes.

"You had no way of knowing that everything would end up so bad."

"You guys warned me."

"Yes, but we never imagined she would be capable of doing something like that. So you, who had so much hope that your mother Precia would change, could much less have imagined it."

"Do you know what the worst thing is?" she asked not looking at her face in shame fir what she was going to confess.

"What?"

She remained silent trying to get the courage to speak.

"What is it Fate?" she took her hand as sign of support.

"That even after all that, when receiving a call or a message I can't help to think that perhaps it's my mother regretting everything."

Arf had to make a great effort not to take Fate by shoulders and shake her so she could react; nevertheless, she understood that it already was hard enough having to live with that feeling as well as having to listen to criticism from others. So she just placed her arm around Fate's shoulders and hugged her.

"Don't worry Fate, everything will be okay… everything will be okay."

* * *

It took some days before Arf was decided to make a little move in the task of getting Fate to recover her life. It was clear what that motivated Fate to go out with Nanoha, but as it was, most likely that the bond between them would grew, and when it was inevitable that Nanoha found out about her preferences, everything would get complicated and turn out all a disaster, so she thought it was time to act.

Fate and Nanoha were in their office working super concentrated when Arf suddenly came. So much, that none of them realized she was standing in the doorway until she lightly knocked to attract their attention.

"Morning, can I come in?"

"Arf!" Fate said surprised.

"Hi Fate." she smiled as she walked in and went around her the desk to give her a kiss on the cheek. "I hope you don't mind me being here."

"No, of course not. It just surprises me." she said, still with astonishment.

"Yes, well… I was around here and I decided to come and say hi." still smiling, she looked at Nanoha. "You must be the famous Nanoha?"

"Famous?" she said opening her eyes in surprise.

"Yep… Fate has talked so much about you. Well, you're the only one she has talked about actually…" she quickly said when feeling Fate moving from her chair. "Of course, knowing her as I do, it's most likely that you're the only one she talks to… she's a little antisocial." she said making a gesture as if it was a secret and then they both began to laugh. "Nice to meet you, I'm Arf. Fate's roommate" she said shaking Nanoha's hand.

"Nice to meet you." she broadly smiled.

"Well you already met Nanoha and you said hi to me, so now…" she left sentence like that hoping for Arf to continue it, but she only looked at her with a half smirk on her lips.

"You're not even going to offer me a sit?" she dramatized being offended.

"We're working Arf, so it's not much what we can do."

"I know, but a simple coffee can't be denied to anyone… at least a glass of water." she said as she sat across from Nanoha's desk.

Fate immediately knew it would be impossible to quickly get rid of Arf, so she took a deep breath and got up smiling.

"Of course, I'll get you. A cup. Of coffee." she said it emphasizing each word.

Nanoha did nothing but smile at the interaction between Fate and Arf. It was obvious that Arf enjoyed intimidating Fate, in a funny way.

"And tell me… how has it been working with Fate?"

"Great, she's… excellent in her work"

Nanoha smiled when seeing that Arf squinted as a sign of suspicion.

"Are you sure you're not telling me this because I'm a friend of her?"

"Nooo! Of course not. I'm serious."

"Don't get me wrong, I know she's a great professional, but at home she can sometimes be unbearable so…"

"Who is unbearable?" asked Fate when entering with the cup of coffee that she had been quick to prepare.

"You of course, who else." Arf casually answered. "I don't know Nanoha enough to say that about her and we know it's not easy living with you."

"HA! That's what you say" she said handing her the cup of coffee. "Wouldn't it be the other way around?"

"Of course not, what happens is that you don't understand me, that's the difference, hahahaha. But well, let's leave that subject there and let's talk about what brought me here."

"I knew there was something behind this visit."

"Don't stress, it's nothing bad. I just wanted to invite you to bowling tonight. Or rather, invite both of you to bowling tonight."

Nanoha's eyes opened wide and she raised her eyebrows as a sign of being excited about the idea. Fate was silent watching Arf for a few seconds before looking at Nanoha. She knew that by mentioning the word Bowling it was difficult for Nanoha not to get all carried away, since it was her favorite sport, so she knew Arf had everything planned from the moment she entered the office.

"What do you say?" Arf urged looking from Nanoha to Fate. "Are you with me?"

"For me there's no problem." Nanoha quickly answered.

Fate thought about it for some time before answering, she had no way of refusing, Nanoha knew she had no other plan for that evening so it would be very strange if she refused.

"Ok, we'll go then"

"YEEEEESSSSS!" Arf said with a gesture of satisfaction. "Then I'll see you at the usual place Fate at 6. Is that Ok?"

"Perfect!" answered Nanoha.

"Don't you want to go to your house and change into something more comfortable?" Fate said trying to dissuade her.

"The truth is I don't mind going like this."

"And in any case you guys can go the apartment and she can borrow something from me. You don't care do you? I think we're like the same size." Arf offered.

"Yes, but don't worry, there's no need. I'm comfortable like this."

"Well, then there's nothing left to say." she got up and placed her cup on the desk. "I'll be waiting, don't be late ok."

Arf said goodbye giving a kiss on the cheek to both and then left as fast as she came.

Fate was worried the rest of the day. It wasn't that Arf was evident in her appearance, but she had never had qualms about hiding her sexual preferences. She was discreet according to the place she was in, but it was thought that the more barriers and masks you put on the matter, the more obvious it became.

Upon arriving at the meeting place, Fate found that it was not only Arf but there was also Hayate and Signum. She tried to hide her agitation, but Nanoha noticed the change. For a moment she doubted that Fate liked her presence there, but when she was about to attempt making something up and leave, Arf joined them very enthusiastically and without giving her time to talk or think, she grabbed them both by the hands and took them inside.

As soon as she could, Fate managed to take Arf away from the group to talk.

"Can you tell me what the hell you're trying to do?" she muttered to pass unnoticed.

"What do you mean?" she said, slightly raising her eyebrows.

"You know what I mean. First you show up at the office unannounced, you make this invitation that you knew Nanoha wouldn't refuse and now, you include Hayate and Signum into this."

"What's wrong with that? I don't see where's the problem. I just wanted us to have a good time, nothing more."

"And you couldn't just tell me that?"

"Would you have come? Cause so far you've rejected any invitation we made to you."

Fate couldn't fight against that argument, so she took a bit of her water.

"Fate, I didn't do this with the intention of harming you, but you don't leave any other option. You have to gradually get your life back."

"Yes, but there's no need to get Nanoha involved in it"

"If you really want to keep her as a friend, you have to do it…" she made a pause before continuing. "I'm not saying you have to tell her everything, but at least, try to make her know you for who you really are, and not only for what you want her to see." Fate stayed silent, she didn't know what to say. For her part, Arf patted her shoulder to calm her. "Don't worry, we won't do anything to harm you."

Even though Nanoha was really into the game, she noticed the brief conversation between them. She didn't know what they were talking about, but she suspected that her presence there had something to do with it.

She waited a while to see what would happened, however, Fate's tension was slowly disappearing, in the end she was relaxed and completely involved in the game like the others, so she decided to let it go and wait for a more adequate time to investigate what had happened. After all, all the others treated her in the best way, since they introduced themselves it had been like if they knew each other for a lifetime, so deep down she didn't want to leave and much less to create discomfort in Fate again.

Meanwhile, Fate decided to calm down and leaver her fears aside. She knew none of them would do anything that might expose them unnecessarily, so she began to enjoy the moment, the place and the company. Until then she hadn't realized the need she had to spend some time with Arf, Hayate and Signum; the fact that Nanoha was there made it even better, since they had indentified with each other so much in the last month, that she really enjoyed spending time with her. Could she trust her? Could she tell her what she was without receiving a rejection from her? These were questions that haunted her mind. It wasn't like it was necessary for her to do it, nothing demanded her to do it, but she knew that to cultivate a true friendship with Nanoha, it would be much better that she found out from her own mouth than by any external situations. She didn't know when or how to tell her, she only knew she had to do it.

When it came time to go, Hayate suggested going to the movies two days later, to which all agreed. Yuuno, Nanoha's husband, was still on his trip so for her it was a great idea. She had become accustomed to sharing the evening with Fate, instead of arriving at her home to be alone, and now that the group had gotten bigger, it excited her even more.

On the day of the movies, Nanoha thought it best to make sure everything was okay with Fate and prevent her from feeling uncomfortable again for her presence. So far, there hadn't been any signs of her disagreeing or being bothered by her inclusion in Hayate's plans, but still, she thought it best to be sure. Besides that it intrigued her the reason for Fate's reaction at the bowling. Just an hour before getting out of work and meeting the others, Nanoha brought out the subject.

"We had a really great time at the bowling right?" Nanoha said tying to sound casual.

"Yeah, I know" Fate answered smiling. "Although you beat us all."

"Well, playing since an young age paid off." She answered with a shrug and a guilty look.

"Well yes, but don't get used to it, it was just lack of practice from our part. Just let us get intone and you'll see."

They both laughed. After a short pause Nanoha spoke again.

"It didn't bother you that I went?"

"Umm?"

"That if my presence bothered you?"

"Why do you say that?"

"It's just that I had the impression that at first you didn't want me to be there."

Fate's expression changed to surprise, because she thought she had managed to hide her reluctance to being there. Shaking her head she said.

"That's not true."

"Are you sure?... Fate, I don't want to be a bother to you, really. If it bothers you that I spend time with your friends, it's ok, some people don't like to share their friends and I understand…"

"It's not that, Nanoha" she cut her. "Believe me, that's not the problem."

"But there's a problem then."

"No… ah…" Fate didn't know how to explain it without telling her the real reason. "It's a little bit more complicated than that, but you don't have worry. Since that has been solved. In fact, I'm glad you get along with them. They're like my sisters and you… well, you've earned a place among the people I care for, so… just don't think about that."

Nanoha looked at her for a moment. As much as Fate assure her that everything was over, she knew that whatever it was, it was important. When she intended to continue the conversation, the president's secretary came.

"Fate, Nanoha, meeting now." she told them pointing to the door of the boss's office.

"We'll be there in a few minutes." Nanoha smiled.

"I don't think so, IT'S NOW." she repeated emphasizing the last word and then immediately left.

Nanoha took a deep breath before getting up and heading to the door. Fate noticed that Nanoha wouldn't leave the matter just like that. In the short time she had known her, she knew she didn't like leaving problems unresolved, or to let a lot of time pass without solving them.

Upon arriving at Mr. Nakajima's office, they both sat in front of his desk.

"Well ladies, I called you because I wanted to inform you of how pleased I am with the work you've done so far. Nanoha, you know this past year had been excellent, costumer are very happy with the work you've done, however, I can't fail to recognize that the work you've done together has been exceptional. So I congratulate you and encourage you to keep up with the excellent work you're doing."

"Thank you!" the two said together.

"Wow, that's what I call a team." Mr. Nakajima joked, and the three of them laughed.

"I won't take any more of your time, I'm heading out for a trip right now and I didn't want to leave without talking with you two."

"We greatly appreciate the gesture Mr. Nakajima. And we assure you that we'll continue that way." Fate told him stretching out her hand.

"I'm sure of it." he shook hands with Fate and then Nanoha. "Well, see you again on Tuesday."

They both nodded and left. Nanoha instead of heading to their office went on the direction of the bathroom. Fate had the intention to follow her, but thought it better to wait for her to return.

In the bathroom, Nanoha tried to keep her composure, she didn't know why, but the fact of knowing that Fate had not wanted her to go out with her friends, had hurt her. It was obvious that they hardly knew each other, two months is too short to be considered the closest friends, but in all that time she had felt that the trust between them grew and that situation felt like a step backwards. She thought of going out to confront her and ask for an explanation, but after a few minutes, she decided she had no right to demand or ask anything, so she would just leave everything as it was.

Upon entering the office, she acted as if what happened before had been nothing. She sat down and kept working. She felt how Fate repeatedly looked at her as if trying to talk, but in ultimately didn't say a word.

Fate debated between keeping things as they were or finish telling her the root of her reaction the other day. She feared that the story would repeat itself and Nanoha would consider her a sick person or a weirdo for being gay, but something inside her screamed that she wasn't that kind of person, that perhaps everything would be different. Al least that's what she needed.

The rejection suffered in her previous work when discovering her condition was something that left her insecure and her self-esteem destroyed. The looks of disgust, derogatory comments and constant teasing had deeply marked her, hence she needed Nanoha to be different, she needed to be able to tell her and that she accepted her as she was, without prejudice. But the fear paralyzed her.

After a long time in silence, Nanoha looked at her. In doing so she realized the tense expression and of… fear? That Fate had, so she couldn't keep on ignoring her.

"Fate, are you okay?" Fate didn't answer, she only looked at her in silence. For the first time, she saw her vulnerable, fragile. This frightened her. "Fate what's wrong?" she approached her and sat beside her.

When she thought that Fate wouldn't talk, she did.

"I'm gay." she said almost as a whisper.

"What?" although she had heard, she couldn't help asking.

"I said I'm gay" she looked into her eyes. "That's the reason I was afraid that you went out with us. I was afraid you would realize it."

They both looked at each other in silent and holding their breath. Fate, waiting for a reaction and Nanoha, trying to assimilate the news.

"Well… ah… I understand." Nanoha finally said. "Is there something else?"

Nanoha looked at her confused. She expected anything but that.

"No, that's it."

"Ok." Nanoha got up and went to her desk to get some water.

"Say it." Fate prompted.

"Say what?"

"What you think. Just say it without hesitation." Fate was preparing for the hit. She knew Nanoha was holding it and she just wanted to know once and for all what she would have to face.

"I didn't expect that, I'm not going to lie. But for me… that doesn't change who you are." she said looking straight into her eyes and without hesitation.

"Are you sure?" she asked after a moment of silence.

"I'm sure."

"Are you not afraid it might be contagious? Or that I harass you?" she insisted.

"As far as I know, being gay is not a disease, so I couldn't catch it. And about the other thing… will you?"

"No" she slightly shook her head.

"Then there nothing to argue about."

Fate tried to find any sign of doubt in her voice or her eyes, but they both were as firm as when taking a decision at work. At that moment, relief washed over her, so much she couldn't keep her eyes getting fill with tears. She tried repeatedly to blink away the tears, but the emotions were too many. It was like being reborn in that same instant. Nanoha rushed to her and hugged her tightly. There she realized that Fate was expecting the worst, and that probably something really bad must have happened in the past.

"I don't know what you expected Fate, but I assure you this doesn't change my perception of you."

Fate breathe out before embracing Nanoha's waist. She didn't like being so fragile, but for the first time in months she didn't feel like a sick woman. Nanoha consoled her stroking her hair. They stayed like that for a few minutes while Fate recovered her composure.

"Better?" Nanoha asked after separating.

"Yes, thank you." she wiped her face with the back of her hand.

"Then… does that mean I can continue going out with you guys?"

Fate nodded smiling still wiping her face.

"Good, because it had been a long time since I had so much fun." she winked at her and also smiled.

"Nano…" she started to say but didn't continue.

"I won't tell anyone, don't worry." she understood her anguish.

With an intense look she told her how much she appreciated that she accepted her. For her part, Nanoha was happy that Fate had trusted her with something so important.

To Be Continued…

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**A/N: **Hope you guy liked this first chapter, there's gonna much more things happening on the next one I promise. One more thing, this story is kinda short, there's only 7 chapter but most of them are as long as this one so I'm gonna update a chapter per week. Thanks for reading and please review :-)


	2. It's Her, Her Husband, And I

…the heat and the tension she felt for having her right at the touch of her fingertips, was almost unbearable…

"It's her, her husband and… I"

Four months have passed since Fate confessed to Nanoha her condition and rather than becoming more distant, the bond between them became greater. At work everyone joked saying they looked like twins, because they were never separated from each other. Even at lunch time, the routine had changed, at first they took turns cooking and bringing the food to the office for both, but then they changed the place to Fate's house. By being just two blocks away from the office, they decided it was better to bring the food there on the days that it was Nanoha's turn to cook.

In the afternoons, they had enrolled in Pilates classes, so three days a week, they went there straight from the office. The other days they simply returned to Fate's house and had dinner with Arf watching TV, if she arrived early.

Saturdays, they left for doing things on their own, however, on Sundays they took turns between the house of Hayate and Signum or Fate and Arf's, to meet and play cards. They had done it at first just to have a good time while making hamburgers, however, they liked it so much they decided they could do it every Sunday. Except the weekends when Yuuno came home.

From the moment the girls heard that Nanoha knew about them, they had adopted her as the straight-friend of the group. Wherever they where, they were always looking after her, she didn't understand why, but they treated her like a little sister and although deep down the situation made her laugh, she couldn't deny she loved how she felt about it. She loved to be part of their lives and loved even more that they were part of hers. So much, that in one of the weekends that Yuuno had being in town, he tried to convince Nanoha of presenting them to him so that he could know who she spent time with when he was gone and she had flatly refused saying she wanted to keep that part to herself, without sharing them with anyone else who wasn't her. Of course that all of this had to do with the fact that Nanoha wanted to avoid Yuuno from finding out or realizing their sexual preferences. She knew that after meeting them he would want to introduce them to some of his friends from work, so for the sake of avoiding that scene, she decided to leave it as something private and exclusive to her.

One Friday night, Nanoha was at Fate's house helping her pack, since that weekend she was going to Arf's beach house with the other girls. Nanoha was a little sad about not being able to go with them because at the last minute, Yuuno had told her that he was coming back home.

"So at what time does Yuuno arrive?" Fate asked as she straightened her bag of cosmetics.

"I still don't know. He told he would call to confirm."

"Well don't be upset, you'll get to go on another occasion."

"Yeah sure, since Arf takes weekends off so often…" she said sarcastically.

"Don't worry, I'll plan another trip soon." she smiled a little amused by Nanoha's expression of grumbling.

"I'm happy that Yuuno is coming, you know? But it also bothers me that he changed my plans just like that. I was so excited to go with you guys."

"Yeah, we were as well. But I insist, I'll use everything in my power so we can go back soon. Meanwhile, I'll keep in touch by text."

"And what are you going to say! How much fun you're having without me? No thank you." she rolled her eyes.

"Hahaha. That's true, sorry. Then we'll talk on Monday…"

"Well, not so much like that either."

"Then what do we do?" Fate couldn't stop smiling. It was the first time she saw her act like a child.

"I don't know, I have to think. I'll text you."

"Okay." she said shaking her head.

Half an hour later each headed their own way. Nanoha with mixed feelings because she wanted to see Yuuno, but also wanted to go to the beach with the girls. It was hard to explain, it was a mixture of frustration and joy alike.

Meanwhile, the girls also felt bad because they've being all week planning the trip so that Nanoha could see the house, and now she couldn't go, it was disappointing. However, they all had clear that the reason for her staying was more important than to go on a trip with a group of lesbians; so there was no discussion whatsoever.

Nanoha went home to await the call to go pick up Yuuno at the airport. She bathed, put on comfortable clothes and sat down to watch TV. Her cell phone rang and she knew it was Yuuno so she quickly answered.

"Hello!"

"_Hi, Nanoha"_

She knew Yuuno very well and by his off tone of voice she immediately knew something was wrong.

"What happened." she asked without further ado.

"_Nanoha…"_

"What happened, Yuuno? Where are you?"

"_I won't be able to return this weekend." _he finally said after a few seconds.

Nanoha closed her eyes and squeezed the phone until her knuckles turned white.

"_Nano… Nanoha talk to me." _Yuuno knew how much it bothered Nanoha when he couldn't get home in the promised date, so he knew how upset she should be at that moment. _"I'm sorry. I'm really sorry, but Mr. Chrono needs to stay until Monday at least."_

"So to hell with what I need, right?"

"_Nanoha don't say that."_

"And what do you want me to say if that's exactly what you're implying!"

"_No Nanoha, it's not like that, you know very well that I'm dying to return home to be with you… but I can't tell the boss that I'm leaving just like that."_

"You can't or you don't want?"

"_You know it's not like that…"_ he began to speak, but Nanoha interrupted.

"You know what Yuuno? I'm getting tired of this, really, and right now I don't feel like talking with you, so let's talk when you feel like coming back."

Without waiting for a reply, she cut the call. The mixture of anger, sadness and abandonment made her explode in tears. She tossed the phone aside and began to cry inconsolably. It wasn't the first time that something like that happened, but it was the first time she didn't have something else to spend her time with and not think about it.

The cell phone rang about five more times, Nanoha didn't answer. Then her house phone began to ring, and she also ignored it. It wasn't until an hour after that her cell phone rang again, but this time with the ringing that identified Fate, so she answered immediately.

"Hello." she answered in a whisper.

"_Nanoha?"_

"Yes, hi, are you there yet?"

"_No, we're halfway there, we stopped so Signum could throw up in the bathroom, I think it was a little rough for her… what's wrong? And Yuuno?"_

Nanoha reluctantly smiled making a sound of disgust.

"He's not coming."

Fate stayed silent for a moment.

"_I'm sorry."_

"No more than me. I threw away my plans to be with him, and now… agh! It doesn't matter."

"_We're ready Fate!"_ Arf yelled at her from the car, since Fate had left the car to make her call. Nanoha heard in the distance how they were calling her.

"Go head, don't make them wait, that way you won't arrive so late."

"_I'll call when we get there."_

"All right."

Fate hung up and returned to the car.

"Everything okay?" Arf asked seeing her so serious.

"Yuuno didn't return."

Arf stared at her understanding what it meant to Nanoha.

"Then plan B." without waiting for Fate to ask what was the "plan B" Arf got out and went to Hayate's car that was behind them. She approached the window, exchanged a few words and then went back. "Done, I'm going with the girls. You take my car and go look for her."

Fate was speechless. Deep down that's what she wanted to do, but she hadn't dared to propose it to Arf thinking she would wouldn't agree, after all, Arf was extremely possessive and jealous with her car, which she never led to anyone. Without waiting for Arf to change her mind, she ran out to the other side of the car.

"I leave you with my things. Be careful and call me when you get there."

Arf gave her a light kiss on the cheek and closed the door.

It didn't take her more than an hour to get back. There wasn't much traffic and the light of the almost full moon lit the road pretty well, so she took the chance to go a little faster than normal.

When she reached Nanoha's house, the lights were all off. She hesitated for a moment if it was a good idea to knock, but after spending a couple of minutes in front of the door, she decided that since she had driven all the way back, the least she could do was try. She knocked on the door twice. Not too hard, but high enough to be heard.

There was no answer. She insisted again fearing that Nanoha was too deep into sleep to hear her knocking. Soon she heard movement inside and not many seconds passed before the door opened.

"Fate! What are you doing here?" she said, squinting, as the light outside dazzled her.

"I came to get you." she casually answered. As she looked into her eyes she knew she had been crying all that time. She had the impulse to draw her into her arms and comfort her.

"But… I don't understand… weren't you halfway there already?"

"Yes, but a friend needed help so I couldn't possibly leave her."

Nanoha breathed out after hearing that. She didn't know whether to laugh or to cry for the excitement, so she just nodded.

It only took her 15 minutes to fix her bag and leave. Along the way, they didn't talk much. Nanoha told her about the brief conversation she had with Yuuno and then they just spend the time listening to music and singing.

Upon entering the neighborhood where the house was and noticing that most of the homes there were two and three stories high, she was surprised and couldn't help whistling in amazement.

"They're impressive right." Fate told her a little amused, because she had acted the same way the first time she went there.

"They're huge… and very nice."

"Yes, Arf comes from a wealthy family. It's just that when they found out about her homosexuality they tried in every way possible to remove that 'disease'. The last thing they did was to disinherit her and banish her from the family. Her grandfather was the only one who didn't join the conspiracy, so to speak. When he died 5 years ago, Arf and the whole family were surprised that he left the house just for her. He even left clauses in which he indicated that if any family member tried to take it off from her, they would demolish it and give the land to a charity. On the other hand, he left her a high enough fund for her entire life, but Arf only uses it for the home maintenance."

"Wow, what a lovely family." she said in a sarcastic tone.

"They're all wonderful." Fate added. "After that, they made it very clear they didn't want to see her again anymore. Hence, she's so attached to us. She tries to hide it and make herself look tough, she tries to pretend she is not jealous of any of us, but we know that's not true."

"It must be very difficult not having a family."

"Well, she never was the type to get along with her parents and siblings. She was always a rebel. But yes, it was very difficult at first." they stayed silent for a moment until Fate smiled.

"What?" Nanoha asked intrigued.

"Nothing, just remembering that at first Arf was jealous of you."

"Of me?" she opened her eyes wide.

"Yes" she smiled more broadly. "But now, I think she likes you more than she does me. So much that she didn't hesitate a minute to offer me her car to go look for you." when saying this, they were already outside of the house waiting for the parking gate to open.

"So it was her idea?"

"Yeah, after I told her Yuuno hadn't returned, she didn't even give me time to talk. She arranged everything a told me to go back."

Nanoha's eyes became teary. She knew that they all liked her very much, but knowing that, made her realized how special they were. She blinked several times to dispel the tears and as soon as she could, she got out of the car.

They hadn't finish getting the things off the car when Arf appeared and greeted them very warmly. She gave her a tour around the house, the kitchen all in shaded of light and dark blue, the entertainment room with a huge LCD TV, sound equipment and a pool table, a dining table convertible from 6 to 10 seats, on the second floor there were 6 rooms, three with triple bunk beds and three with double beds and their own bathrooms. Her room was in the attic and it spread across the entire width of the house, giving the impression that it was an annex.

Outside the house, next to the pool there was a hut with a bar, a freezer, dishwasher and a small grill. Around the pool, several sun loungers and a small shower. Behind the pool, there was a small door through which you could go straight to the beach. It was the perfect vacation home.

"Well lady, now that you know the house, you can decide which room to stay in and get your thinks settle. Make yourself at home."

"Thank you, really. This…" indicating the whole house. "… is amazing."

Arf grinned and nodded.

"And what are you waiting for to begin enjoying it then? Come on! Hurry up and go change. We'll be waiting outside."

She slightly patted her shoulder and went out. At that moment Fate was coming in.

"How was it?"

"Incredible… I have no words."

They both laughed.

"Well then go get yourself settle."

"Aren't you coming?"

"I'll probably sleep with Hayate and Signum."

"And you're going to leave me alone? No, no nonono." she said shaking her head. "You're crazy if you're thinking of leaving me alone in this big house." she said looking around as if frightened.

Fate smiled surprised and amused.

"Well… then we share a room?" she said between question and statement.

"Thanks." she answered with relief.

When they went up to the floor of the rooms. Nanoha went into one of the double bedrooms. Fate didn't say anything, but was surprised by the choice. Upon entering, Nanoha left her things on the bed before inspecting the bathroom.

"This is good." she said after coming out.

Fate nodded without saying a word, she was still in shock and Nanoha noticed it.

"Does it bother you sharing the room with me?"

"No."

"But you don't look very convinced."

"It's okay, really. It's just that I was surprised you chose this room."

"Yes well, I prefer to have a private bathroom. Usually I get up several times to the bathroom at night and I don't want to have to swarm down the hallway in the early morning… I get a little scared at night." she confessed.

"Really?" she couldn't believe what she was hearing.

"Yes. Actually, I'm afraid of the dark when I'm not in a familiar place." she said embarrassed. "That's why I also chose this type of bed. If I feel someone beside me, I don't feel the need to turn on the lights."

Fate felt heart tightened when hearing that confession.

"Ok." she said to reassure her.

"Fate… I would prefer it the others don't…"

"They won't find out, don't worry." She told her.

Nanoha smiled widely.

"I'll go change." she said as she took her things out of her bag.

"I'll see you down, then."

When she was about to leave the room Nanoha called her.

"Fate… could you…" her face all flushed with embarrassment. "stay?"

At that moment, Fate realized that she was not only afraid of the dark, but of being alone in a house that was unfamiliar to her. To not make the situation more difficult, she made something up.

"How about I stay and settle all the things right now. So when we come back to sleep everything will be in place."

Nanoha silently thanked Fate's gesture. She took a quick shower and put on one of her bathing suits and on top, a white cotton dress that showed her well toned body. She fixed her hair and left.

When Fate saw her she couldn't avoid starring at her in astonishment like the time when she first saw her in her tights for doing Pilates just that this time, Nanoha had noticed.

"Sorry." she quickly said looking away when she saw the amused look from Nanoha.

"It's fine." she smiled. "It's good to know I haven't lost my charm."

"Not at all." she immediately thought and although she had no intention of saying it aloud, the words left her mouth before she could retain them.

Nanoha laughed out loud and then mischievously winked at her.

"Should we go down now?" with a small nod she pointed towards the door.

"Yes, of course. Let's go."

That night, having a new visitor, the tradition was that they should drink Margaritas. So they alternated swimming in the pool with rounds of preparation at the bar. Each one had to prepare a round.

Around 3 am, fatigue and the drinks began to take effect, so they went to sleep. Nanoha was a little more drunk than the others, since it was also a tradition that for the new person, they prepared the margaritas a bit more loaded than the others, thus ensuring the handover the next day and of course, the conditions necessary to joke about it all day.

As they went up to the room, Fate had to grab Nanoha by the waist so she could keep her balance. Upon reaching the room, she sat on the bed but fell backwards and then she began to laugh.

"God, I'm very drunk." She laughed out loud again. "But I don't get it…" she said trying to sit down with Fate's help. "I drank the same as all of you guys."

"That's not true."

"Of course it is, I didn't drink more than all of you." she said moving her index finger.

"In number of drinks no, but in level of alcohol…" she said with a guilty look.

"Wait, wait… how is that?"

"I mean that your drinks were more concentrated than ours."

"So… you wanted to get me drunk?"

"Yes" she answered with a shrug.

"You guys are so… so… evil." she tried to sound upset, but the laughter that followed shattered her attempt. "Ok, ok… I assure you I'll get revenge, I assure you."

"But that will be tomorrow, now we have to get you in bed."

"I have to take this off first." she pointed to her bathing suit.

"Ok." Fate went to the closet to get Nanoha's bag. When she turned around she realized that Nanoha had already removed the top part of the bathing suit, revealing her breasts. Fate needed every ounce of self control she had to not give in to the desire so strong she felt from seeing her. Those breasts were calling her to devour them, the same as her abdomen, neck, legs… She shook her head to ward off those thoughts that were of no help at all at that moment.

"What do I take out?" she asked as she tried not to look at her.

"A light pink pajamas. It's a short and a tank top." she said with her eyes almost closed. She was falling asleep.

Fate quickly looked for them, not only to let Nanoha fall asleep at once, but also to get her dressed. Having her like that was too much temptation. After all, Fate had being ages without being with someone, so no matter how much her mind screamed that Nanoha was, in every way, beyond reach, her body didn't think so. Quite the opposite, it pushed her to want to enjoy it.

She took out the pajamas and handed them to her. Nanoha fought to put on the tank top, but her hands were not coordinating so Fate had to help her. As she pulled the tank top down her head and shoulders, she unintentionally touched her breasts. The electric shock that she felt left her out of air. With clumsy hands, she finished getting the shirt in place.

"Done." she said running her hand across her forehead nervously.

"The shorts too. This is wet." she said pointing to bottom part of the bathing suit.

"Of course… of course." she swallowed hard.

Without much thought, she prepared to take the piece of clothing off. At that moment, her heart was beating like crazy, her hands were sweating and her mouth felt dry. She needed a drink, she thought. Nanoha leaned back to make it easier for Fate the task of taking off the piece of garment. When Fate took it off and stood there before her smooth and flushed intimate part, she almost threw herself on her. Never before had she being in such a situation where she had to have so much willpower not to give vent to her savage and primitive desires. By achieving to put the shorts on her, she took a deep breath and stood up again.

"I'll go leave this in the bathroom." she said referring to the bathing suit. She really needed to get out of there even for a few minutes, she needed to throw some cold water in her face or otherwise she wouldn't be able to stand it another minute.

When she got out, Nanoha was already in the bed soundly sleeping. Fate stood watching her for a while before deciding that taking a cold shower would help, it was the only way she could survive to sleeping next to her.

When getting on the bed, she had to stay as far away from Nanoha as possible because though the weather was pretty cool and the cold shower had helped, the heat and the tension she felt for having her right at the touch of her fingertips, was almost unbearable. Little by little, she managed to regulate her heart and fell asleep like Nanoha.

To Be Continued…

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**A/N: **Hello again, so what do you guys think? liking the story so far? things are getting interesting right. Well, i know some of you don't like the idea of Nanoha with Yuuno, but if they weren't together there would be no story, so you'll have to bear with it, anyway please review and I'll be back soon with chapter 3. :)


	3. It's Her and I

Fate woke up before first. She looked at Nanoha, peacefully sleeping for a few minutes before getting up. She couldn't believe how close she had been to a disaster last night.

Since the first time she saw Nanoha, she thought of her as a very attractive woman, straight and long red hair reaching to the middle of her back, deep blue eyes that when excited acquired a lighter color, her slim body and with a tint like… strawberries and cream, without exaggerated proportions, well shaped legs that she had been able to see when she wore skirts, perfect face with a small mouth but perfectly outlined, long eyelashes, outlined nose and that necklace with a red diamond that always adorned her neck.

She couldn't deny the obvious, she was beautiful, but despite this until that moment she had refused to look at or think of her with other eyes that weren't those of a friend. It had been like that up until last night.

While she washed in the bathroom, she couldn't help but remember those so desirable breasts, that abdomen and belly, that intimate part with so tight lips that she felt like trying… just remembering it made the heat spread though her whole body, specially its center, which was a real problem. How to look at her in a different way now? How to be with her and not want to wrap her arms around her and feel her body?

It was a problem. A really big problem. Not just for the fact that Nanoha was her colleague and friend, but also because she was straight and married; and she already knew that getting involved with married women was a guaranteed disaster.

She finished getting ready and slipped out of the room. Upon reaching the kitchen, she found Arf taking her morning coffee looking at the horizon through the kitchen window. Hayate and Signum were sunbathing by the pool.

"Good morning." she said to Arf.

"Hi." she quietly said and without looking away. "There's freshly made coffee if you want some."

"Thanks." Fate poured a cup of coffee and sat down next to Arf.

"And Nanoha?"

"Still sleeping"

"Last night… everything okay?" she asked looking at her.

"Yes." she answered looking back at her but then looking away.

Arf who knew her well, narrowed her eyes before speaking.

"What happened?"

"Nothing, I swear it." she quickly said.

"Fateeeee…"

"Nothing really." although it was true that nothing had happened, the feeling of guilt made her look uneasy.

"First of all, why did you sleep together." she bluntly asked.

"Nanoha felt intimidated by the house so she asked me share a room with her."

"And the bed too?"

"She preferred a room with its own bathroom."

"Right." so far the answers weren't crazy, but something didn't smell good. "Then why do you have such a guilty look?"

"It's nothing." she tried to let it go.

"You know you're going to talk anyway, so why don't we save some time and just tell me right now." Fate took a deep breath before telling her exactly everything that had happened the night before.

"…and now I can't help looking at her and…" she tried to say it but the words wouldn't come out.

"Wanting her?" Arf completed. Fate nodded and once again the feeling of guilt invaded her. "You're not made of stone Fate, it would've being strange if you hadn't felt anything."

"Yes, but that doesn't help. What do I do now? With what face do I look at her?"

"Nothing has to change. First, wait to see if she remembers anything. If she does, then wait to see what she thinks and how she feels. Don't make a fuss ahead of time."

"Easy to say. It's not you who has her image printed on the memory. God I feel like a pervert!" she cried out raising her hands to her face.

"You would be one if you would've taken advantage of the situation, which you didn't, so stop it." Fate nodded again. "What you have to do is to focus your attention is something else."

"What do you mean?"

"Leave behind that abstinence and go out into the world again."

"No Arf, forget it. I don't want a relationship…"

"I wasn't talking about a relationship." she cut her. "I just said you should end your abstinence."

"You know I'm not like you. I can't go around sleeping with anyone."

"I understand, but until you get rid of 'ALL THAT ACCUMULATED ENERGY', what happened last night will continue to haunt you. Think about it." Arf patted her leg with affection before getting up and going out to meet with Hayate and Signum in the pool.

Fate stayed sited there for a while thinking over the matter. She had never liked the idea of going from arm to arm every night, but it had being long since she felt any sexual interest in any woman, so until then she hadn't felt any real need to 'RELEASE HER ENERGY'. However, Nanoha had managed to arouse all that need that she thought asleep. So what should she do now? How to avoid having totally sinful thoughts towards Nanoha, her friend, her co-worker? She had to do something and fast before there was the slightest possibility that Nanoha noticed. The last thing she wanted was to lose her friendship for failing to control her hormones. Determined to leave behind everything that happened, she went out to the pool with the others.

An hour later, Nanoha joined them. She still felt the ravages from drinking the night before, however, she was ready for the plans of the day. Arf had told her, when she arrived, that that day they would take a ride on the motorboat around the islets of the bay, so without further delay, they went toward the dock.

The motorboat was a sporty type, a single floor, with seats for the pilot and copilot and a long seat on the back with a motor powerful enough to reach high speeds. Arf had also ordered a special structure to attach a Jet Ski to it, that way, they could go to any shore without having to take so much space with the boat.

They were sailing for about one hour and a half when they decided it was enough and that they wanted to stay in one of the beaches. Arf chose one of the islands less visited by tourists, only those who had boats came there. When they got there, there were about 5 boats, of which one seemed to be occupied by girls only, which Arf didn't miss so she stopped right next to it.

"I think we should be fine here." she said smiling with her eyes fixed on the group of girls near them.

"Nothing could be better I would say." Hayate continued, also with a wide smile and waving at the girls who were now approaching the boat.

"As always you're only looking at that." answered a very angry Signum crossing her arms and turning her back on her.

"Perhaps, you're jealous?" with that last sentence she got dangerously close to Signum's lips before they were sadly interrupted.

"Remember we're not alone." Fate reminded them.

"Don't worry about me, really." Nanoha hasted to say. It wasn't that she felt completely comfortable with it, but she also didn't want to hold them back from doing what they wanted.

"Are you sure?" Fate asked uncertain.

"Yes, of course. I'll be fine." she slightly smiled.

"Well then, we stay here." Arf said rubbing her hands as if she was about to try something really tasty and with a mischievous look.

Everyone laughed at Arf's expressions, knowing too well what that meant; all but Fate. For her, one thing was that Nanoha accepted their preferences and a completely different one was to get her involved, even if it was indirectly, on their hook ups, so she quickly sought for an alternative to get out of there.

"Arf do you mind if I give Nanoha a ride on the Jet Ski?" Fate asked trying to sound casual while the others prepared the things to stay there.

"I've got no problem with that." she casually answered.

"Would you like a ride?" she asked Nanoha.

She shrugged as if undecided. But seeing Fate's eyes, crying for a "yes" from her part, she agreed.

"Well, first help us settle things down and then you can leave, okay?"

And so they did. Within minutes Arf, Hayate and Signum were settled on the island while Nanoha and Fate went for their ride on the Jet Ski. They covered a large expanse of sea, Nanoha was super nervous at first because she thought they could stay adrift in the middle of the sea. Fate took advantage of this weakness to scare her to death by pretending they had run out of gas. After a few minutes of anguish, and seeing the possibility that Nanoha's nerves made her lose control of herself, Fate, without confessing her little prank, continue with the ride as if everything had been an error of the gas meter.

On previous visits, Fate had discovered a small beach to which only small vessels had access to; she thought it was a good idea to take Nanoha there. With great care, since the entrance was jealousy hidden by mangroves, they began to enter. She warned Nanoha where they were headed so she wouldn't get frightened before entering the small beach. It had been a while, but certainly not enough for Arf to have already deployed all her flirting tactics, so spending some time there would be perfect.

When coming out of the dense mangrove forest, before them appeared a paradise beach with crystalline waters. There were only a few palm trees and the sand was so white that the sun could almost be reflected on it.

Nanoha was totally impressed with the spectacular place, so much that she was speechless. Some time passed before she could utter a word.

"This… this is beautiful Fate…"

"Yes, it is…" she broadly smiled feeling satisfied for taking her there.

"How did you found this place?" she asked still spinning on her axis admiring everything around her.

"One day like today I was taking a ride around, aimlessly, when suddenly I saw a couple coming out of here on a Jet Ski. I was curious as it seemed that there was nothing there, so I ventured to investigate what was behind and here it was… this wonderful paradise."

"It's really amazing… I have no words."

"Well, enjoy it then." she said stretching her hand towards the beach signaling her to go.

Nanoha didn't have to think it twice, she went straight towards the water and dived in, finding not only the crystalline of the water but also its delicious warmth. She was swimming and floating for several minutes until she decided to sit near the shore next to Fate.

"Have the others being here?" she asked after a while.

"No, they don't know about it."

"Why?" she asked surprised.

"Because if they did, this would become a dating hotel." she explained.

Nanoha heartily guffawed.

"Don't laugh… you know it's true. I love and adore the three of them, Arf, Hayate and Signum, even though Arf and Hayate are so perverted… anyway… I know they wouldn't appreciate this place for what it is, but for what it can offer as a strategy to hook up with someone, so I refuse to give them that pleasure."

Nanoha laughed a little more before speaking again.

"And you… haven't been tempted to bring someone?"

"No" she replied without hesitation and casually. Nanoha's eyes narrowed at that answer.

"Fate, there's no one here, it's just the two of us so…" she left the sentence incomplete waiting to see if she continued, but Fate didn't. "Oh come on Fate! Do you really think I'm going to believe you haven't brought anyone here?"

"I haven't" she shrugged her shoulders. "So I can't tell you something that's not true."

"But you brought me." she said with doubt.

"Yes, but I'm not trying to seduce you, or anything. I brought you because I felt you would appreciate it as much as I do." she said looking straight into her eyes.

Given that response, Nanoha blushed a little.

"I'm sorry… I didn't want…"

"Don't worry." Fate cut her. "In your place, I would've doubted the same." there was a slight pause. "Anyway, I must confess that of being able to, I would've done it." she said looking down.

"What?" she asked not wanting to assume anything.

"Bringing someone." she answered looking up and fixing her eyes momentarily at the horizon.

Nanoha couldn't help to slightly raise her eyebrows when she heard her, but she said nothing. When Fate looked back at her and saw her questioning look, she went on.

"I only had a chance to share it with two people… but with neither I managed to do it." Fate took some water in her hands and splashed her face. "The first one, was afraid of everything related to the sea. She liked it only if she was on the shore, so I didn't even think of mentioning then Jet Ski. The second…" Nanoha watched how her eyes darkened like the time she talked about her last job, so she thought they were somehow related. "She and Arf never got along, the only time they tried to overcome the differences, we couldn't spend more than one night in the house, the next morning we had to leave at dawn."

Fate stayed absorbed in her thoughts for a moment before slightly shaking her head as if to ward off memories. Nanoha was intrigued to know what had happened, what was it that made her so sad, but she knew it wasn't the time to ask.

"So…" Fate shrugged. "You're the first person I bring here."

"Wow…" she said a little surprised. "I'm flattered by that."

"Yes, well, at least I know that you appreciate it as much as I do, and if you ever come here with Yuuno, I at least know he's your husband, who is someone important to you and not just someone for the moment."

Nanoha laughed at the idea, but not in mockery, but in disbelief.

"Even if I wanted, I wouldn't know how to get here… but thanks anyway." they both laughed. "And speaking of something else… I wanted to thank you for last night."

Fate's heart instantly stopped, but she managed to hide it, she just waited for Nanoha to talk and see how much she remembered about what happened the night before.

"When I woke up I wasn't really sure of what had happened last night… everything was still blurry, but as the day passed, my mind has become clearer… I'm sorry you had to carry me."

"It was nothing." Fate said. "I wasn't going to leave you lying in the pool in that state."

"Considering you guys intentionally got me drunk and you didn't do anything to prevent it, it was the least you could do." Fate pressed her lips trying to avoid laughing. "However, one thing is that you had to carry me to the room and a totally different one is that you had to get me changed."

Fate lowered her eyes for a moment, until that moment she hadn't thought about what had happened the night before, but when she mentioned it, all the pictures immediately came back to her mind. But she knew she had to hide it, so she looked back at her trying to keep a neutral expression.

"The truth is that I wanted to apologize for putting you in that awkward position." she said sounding embarrassed.

"Don't worry about it. I'm sure that if I'd have been in that situation, you'd done the same, so don't worry."

Nanoha smiled in thanks and then they continued talking about other things. A while later, they decided to returned to the island with the others.

When they arrived, the group had extended a little, since they were longer only Arf, Signum and Hayate, but also 3 other girls who were sitting next to Hayate and Arf in the long sit and Signum just looked from afar how they approached her "friend" Hayate. Fate and Nanoha felt uncomfortable at first, but after some time they decided to join them and have a good time.

When it was time to leave, they agreed to meet at Arf's house in the evening for dinner and so they did. A half an hour after they got back, the guest arrived. They sat around the pool talking and enjoying the drinks prepared by Arf.

After eating, the couples were gradually separating, sitting each other apart from the rest, leaving Fate and Nanoha alone on the hut. Fate, who already knew how things would end, chose to take Nanoha for a walk on the beach since it was too early to go to sleep.

They walked along the beach with their feet immersed in the water for quite a while, until they decided to go back. Upon returning, they peered into the house to see how things were going, and they saw Hayate kissing with Signum in the pool.

"It was expected with those two." Fate mildly said to herself.

Arf was talking, very closely, with one girl, sitting on the edge. So they decided to go sit on the edge of the beach to wait for the pool area to clear so they could go to sleep. They talked about many different things, however, the constant breezes made them shiver from the cold. Thinking that enough time had already passed, they get back again, Fate was the first one to look and when seeing the risqué scene in the pool she rushed to prevent Nanoha from seeing it.

"God and n…n…now wh… wh…what do… we do? asked Nanoha hugging herself trying to control her shivering.

Fate thought about it for a moment and then remembered that in the room where they kept the things for the pool, there was a blanket that Arf kept there for the times when they were too lazy to go upstairs and look for blankets or sheets to put on the sun loungers.

"Wait here." she told Nanoha. With great stealth, she went in and searched for the blanket, but not before having to hide behind the hut to avoid being seeing. "Okay, let's go."

They sat close together to cover themselves with the blanket, however, it wasn't wide enough to completely cover them both, so Fate suggested Nanoha to sit between her legs, that way they would both be covered and warm with the blanket.

Nanoha, who couldn't control the shaking of her body, didn't really mind it, so she didn't wait long before sitting down as Fate had indicated.

As the minutes passed, the heat coming from both got extended under the blanket, decreasing the shaking from the cold, however, neither of them made any attempt to separate. They remained silent, each immersed in their thoughts.

"Are you better now?" asked Fate.

"Yes" she smiled. "Now I don't even want to move."

"Neither do I" Fate smiled.

"Good things you remembered about this blanket."

"Luckily Arf had it in the same place. It's the first time I thank that she is the way she is."

"Good for her then." she said as she curled even more in Fate's arms.

There was a pause before Nanoha spoke again.

"Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure"

"When did you realized you were… you were…?"

"Gay?" Fate completed. Nanoha shrugged. Fate thought about it for a moment before answering. "It's not about when I realized it, but rather when I accepted it…I always knew there was something different about me. I remember that since little I like being very close to my sister, not exactly to play, but because I enjoyed her company. I liked to help her, protect her…I don't know how to describe it…the truth is that I didn't like her games, or dolls or anything like that, but I liked being around her.

As I got older, I became like everyone else, but always deep inside, I still felt the same. As a teenager, I realized that I loved my sister more than just a sister or a best friend, but I didn't understand it or accepted it. It was very confusing for me. I died of jealousy whenever she was with her boyfriend, but at the same time, I reproached the fact that it wasn't normal, so I began to go out with whatever guy a liked but it never got further from the word boyfriend or date, nothing really special. It just simply was that none of them met my expectations and didn't fill the big hole of emptiness." she smiled. "I even became famous as a heart breaker…what they never knew was that the one with the broken heart was me, for not accepting what I really felt.

Before entering college, I went to a camp for two weeks. That's when my life changed. I met Teanna and Subaru. They made me face my real feelings and what I really liked… I didn't hate them for it, but it was a total revelation for me to realize that the feelings and emotions, that I myself kept hidden, were the key to free myself from the chains that imprisoned my true self at that time. Those feelings far outweighed the feelings I had for guys." she sighed. "I never saw them again after I returned, but they changed my life completely.

During my freshman year of college, I went to a party and there I met Arisa. It was the birthday of one of my classmates and there she was, always with that strange aura, with that something that makes you notice her even if you don't want to. I saw her talking to one of the guest very close, very intimate…I couldn't stop starring at her, not because I liked her, but because I wanted to do the same as her. In a moment of the night, she came to me and I got super nervous. I didn't know what to do, however, we began to talk about various things until she finally asked if I like women. I almost fainted from the shock. I denied it of course, it terrified me to think that it was so obvious, but in the end, I thought it was my chance to really discover myself. It was at that moment when I accepted my difference and I was willing to face what that meant…and here I am…still facing what it means to be different."

"Wow…it was…it wasn't easy right?"

"Not at all. Some people accept it without problems or doubt… in my case, it wasn't like that. Even after I confronted the idea, a year and a half passed before I dared to act, before unleashing what I really was. Arf's easiness to flirt with people, intimidated me, but more than that, I was afraid of failure, to not be able to meet expectations. But I did it. I managed to break that barrier and after that, I had no more doubts about who I was and what I wanted for the rest of my life."

"And… have you had many girlfriends?"

"Excuse me?" Fate was surprised by the question.

"Sorry. I don't want to be reckless; it's just that you look so different from Hayate and Arf that… it made me curious."

"I understand…" she said after laughing. "Girlfriends… I've had 2, well if you can call them that. I'm not going to lie, at first I wasn't very judicious, not as much as Arf of course, but, you could say I was very free to 'fall in love' for the first time and know what it was to be together with the person you like. Besides, I've always thought that you should make love with that special someone… not just sex without emotions, I hate that idea. Call me romantic or corny, but I just can't think that way."

"Well then I guess I'm also a romantic and corny because I totally think the same as you. I never understood what kind of satisfaction you could get from going from bed to bed. I'm not criticizing, after all, everyone is happy in their own way, but I definitely don't share that idea."

"Yes, sometimes it's hard to understand it." there was a slight pause in which Fate couldn't keep blocking her thoughts about Nanoha. The excessive proximity in which they were right now, made her revive that desire to caress her and kiss every inch of her body. To feel her warmness, her sweet smell, the softness of her hands, which she held together at the edge of the blanket. The breeze, the sound of the waves breaking into the shore, the moonlight reflected offshore, everything was a perfect combination of elements to aggravate her lowest passions. Fate had to hold her breath for a few seconds and close her eyes to return to the here and now. Back to "she's straight and I'm just a friend".

"Is everything okay?" Nanoha, even with her back towards Fate, felt her momentary tension.

"Yes, everything's fine." she quickly said. "I just thought that… sometimes I wish I could be like Arf."

"Why do you say that?" she asked slightly turning around to look at her eyes. It seemed contradictory that only minute before she was talking about not liking that way of life and now she wants to be like that?

"Don't get me wrong, it's just that… when you spend so much time alone and with no prospective partner, well… sometimes it's hard to fulfill certain… needs." she completed a little embarrassed. It wasn't like what she was saying was something unusual, however, being Nanoha who lit that need in her, made it more difficult for her to talk about it.

"Oh!... I understand." She turned to face the front again to avoid Fate from noticing that, although not to the same extent, Nanoha perfectly understood what she was talking about. Just in recent months her relationship with Yuuno had cooled, always for different reasons, but in the end the result was the same. One of the reasons why she didn't like getting home early, was to not think too much about it. "But, you're free, aren't you?, I mean, you could solve that problem with no remorse whatsoever. "

"_I could… but I now you'd never accept_." she thought. "Maybe I'll do it." she whispered.

A few minutes passed in silence before Fate spoke again.

"I think it's time to go back… my butt is numb." the two laughed.

"Yeah, mine's also."

Fate got up first to help Nanoha up, but when she pulled her up, Nanoha lost her balance and fell backwards taking Fate with her, thus leaving the latter on top of her and with their faces close together, their lips almost touching. The moment was brief, since Fate reacted quickly putting distance between them, one more second and she would had not been able to contained to kiss her. As for Nanoha, it was something strange, because the desire she felt to kiss her, paralyzed her, but at the same time, seeing Fate's reaction, left her with a sense of rejection, which made no sense, since she didn't sought that kind of attention from her part.

"I'm sorry." Fate apologized and extended her hand once again.

"The one who should be apologizing it's me, you were just trying to help." she said once lifted.

They both removed the sand from their clothes and began to walk silently towards the house. Upon arrival, everything was dark and silent, only a few lights lip up the surroundings of the house, however, inside, the story was different. You could hear muffled moans coming from the entertainment room as well as one of the double bedrooms. They tried to walk as quietly as possible until they reached their room. When they entered and closed the door, they couldn't help the fits of laughter that it gave them. They did it until they were crying from laughing so hard. The situation was so ironic; they were talking about their lack of sex in their lives, while in two of the rooms, there was clearly more than enough. Minutes later, the sounds were subsiding and thus, the laughter, so they decided to get ready to go to sleep.

Despite the laughter, Fate was in such a sensitive state that what she wanted the most and needed was to fall sleep, to stop thinking, to stop desiring. However, moments before she could completely fall sleep, sounds began to come from the ceiling, which became increasingly loud.

"Please! Are you kidding me!" Fate was annoyed.

Nanoha bit her lower lip to avoid laughing at Fate's expression. "It's very real." she said.

"I can't stand it anymore!" she got up from the bed and began to pace back and forth across the room. When she made the gesture of going to the door, Nanoha spoke.

"Where are you going?"

"I need to get out of here." she said grabbing the doorknob.

"Want me to go with you?"

"NO!" she sharply said. When realizing how she had answered, she turned slightly sideways to look at her. "Right now, I don't think it's safe for you to be near me." And saying nothing more, she almost ran out of the house to the pool, where she threw herself on a sun lounger.

I wasn't the first time that something like that happened with Arf in the house, but it was the first time that the person right next to her rouse so much desire in her. Having her so close and hearing the erotic symphony in the background was pure torture.

Meanwhile, Nanoha was taken aback by what had happened. The situation was uncomfortable yes and at first she didn't understand Fate's words. It took her a few minutes to understand what Fate meant by "not been safe with her". At that moment, she also realized that the image of an intimate approach with Fate, didn't really bothered her. That thought chilled her, then she recalled how good it felt when she had covered her with her arms on the beach and the chill that she felt when they fell on the sand and stood face to face.

It was then that she became aware of Fate's appearance. Blond hair and straighter than hers; red eyes, darker than her hair; cream-colored skin; a well shaped body and a face and look with deep and profound expression, and of those that seem to touch the soul. She realized that Fate attracted her beyond a mere friendship.

Long ago she had felt that same way with another woman. At that time, it had been her neighbor Suzuka which had aroused those feelings in her, but when she moved out, everything disappeared, which made her think that it had just been something temporary, perhaps motivated by the warm and loving personality of her neighbor and the absence of any boy she liked or with whom it was worth dating. But now… again?... Maybe spending so much time with her, sharing her lifestyle was making her confuse empathy with attraction.

She decided not to think more about it. Surely it was all a product of the circumstances and she shouldn't worry too much about it. However, it was easier said than done, but she still managed to fall asleep a little later.

To Be Continued…

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**A/N:** So how did you guys like it? getting better right. Well I'm just gonna tell you that it get's much more interesting, you'll see on the next chapter. Just to give you an idea of what it's gonna be about here's the title: _"It Her, Her Husband, My Lover, and I"_ and also it's gonna the first actual M rated chapter so you can imagine what's gonna happen. Anyway, thanks for reading, please review :)


	4. It's Her, Her Husband, My Lover, And I

**A/N: **I everyone, sorry for updating so late, I had planned to do it earlier but some things came up so, sorry. But anyway here's chapter 4, also there's some things I want to warn you guys about. First, as I mentioned before this chapter is rated M, so be aware of that. Second (please don't hate me for this), the M rated parts are not actually NanoFate, but still please read the chapter, everything is happening for a reason, trust me. Anyway go ahead and read.

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It's Her, Her Husband, Mi Lover, and I

The next morning came and with it the emptiness in the bed next to Nanoha. She stayed lost in thought for a few minutes before getting up and looking out the window. Fate was sleeping, curled up, on one of the sun loungers.

As if she had noticed her presence there, at that moment Fate woke up and looked directly at her. They stared for a moment before Nanoha stepped back and entered the bathroom. When she came out, Fate was already there sitting on her side of the bed.

"Good morning." Fate quietly said.

"Good morning." she answered, slightly smiling and continuing her way to the bed where she had her bag. There was an awkward silence for a few minutes before Fate dared to break it.

"Nanoha… I wanted to explain about last night."

"Don't worry. You don't have to explain anything." she casually said, although on the inside her nerves were on the edge.

"But I want to do it… please." she said standing in front of her but with the bed in between.

Nanoha stopped fixing her bag and slightly nodded. Fate tried to speak twice, but no words came out. She felt ashamed.

"Nanoha, I… how to say it…" she raised her had to her forehead. "It's been some time since I was with someone, ok? And … last night I was a little more sensitive than normal… hearing the background noises made me lose control a little and… well you… you're… I mean… is not that I would've been disrespectful to you but… I just wanted to avoid an uncomfortable situation."

Nanoha looked down with a half smile.

"More uncomfortable than this?" she looked back at her.

"Trust me… it could be worse." she answered as a shade of red raised to her face.

Nanoha nodded. With that, she realized she wasn't indifferent to Fate, or at least, she hadn't been that last night, but also she realized that what had happened didn't bother her, on the contrary she felt a certain joy in it.

"It's alright… I understand" she said after a moment. "Everything was kind of… intense, last night."

"Yes." she said exhaling all the air in her lungs.

"Are you going to sleep a little more?"

"No… I don't think so."

"You should. I don't think you really got much sleep in the cold last night."

At that moment Fate couldn't contain the yawn that escaped her mouth, so she could only cover her mouth half way. "Sorry."

"See what I mean? Why don't you lie down for a while? I'll be downstairs, so you have the bed to yourself."

"There's no need for you to go, I mean, what happened last night… doesn't mean we can't…"

"I know" Nanoha interrupted. "But I'm dying for a cup of coffee, so you go to bed and I go to the kitchen." she smiled as she winked.

Nanoha left just a few minutes after she finished dressing, while Fate, decided to lie down for a while. The truth was that it had been very little what she had managed to sleep last night, so not much time passed between putting her head on the pillow and completely falling to sleep.

The day passed without any incidents. They enjoyed the beach, the sun and the music, until it started to get dark and they had to return home and get ready for work the next day.

* * *

They never brought the subject up again, in fact, it was almost as if nothing had happened. Fate was determined to seek for a solution to her problems and Nanoha, tried to bury the thoughts she had had towards Fate. Everything had worked out well until the day that Arf arrived at the office to invite Fate to a welcome party. Apparently, a friend of them, was returning to the city after a long period abroad. It all sounded normal until she heard her saying that she had to be there, because for the one arriving, Fate was the guest of honor.

"Guest of honor?" asked Nanoha.

"Yes. There's a story behind it." Arf answered smiling.

"There's no story." Fate clarified.

"Because you didn't want to." she replied.

"Anyway it doesn't matter. There's none."

"But there can be." she argued causing Fate to roll her eyes. "So I hope this time you don't put any excuses."

"Arf, just let it go already."

"I can't. You've had enough of that abstinence, and to tell you the truth, I don't even know how you do it, but it's time to take action."

"And isn't it supposed to be me the one to do it."

"Of course, but help never hurts, right Nanoha?"

"Yeah sure… I guess." she replied trying to hide the discomfort that their conversation was causing on her.

"Arf, I appreciate the intention but I can handle it on my own."

"I don't doubt it, but at this rate you'll be double virgin."

"ARF PLEASE!" she said with her eyes wide opened.

"But it's true!"

"I'm not like you Arf…" she began to say, but Arf interrupted her.

"That's obvious. If you were I assure you wouldn't even know the meaning of boring."

"Ok Arf, that's enough." she said annoyed.

"I will not leave until you assure me you'll come to the party."

"Do I have an alternative?" she asked resigned, to which Arf shook her head with a malicious/mischievous smile on her face.

"Say no more. I'll be waiting for you at 9"

"SO LATE!"

Arf took a deep breath before speaking again.

"At 9, Fate" she said with a look of 'I won't say it again'.

Arf said goodbye and left the office as quickly as she came.

The silence that took over the office was a bit uncomfortable. Fate trying to get over the shame of what Arf had said minutes before and Nanoha, trying to control her urge to tell her not to go, that she had nothing to seek or do in that supposed party.

She was really astonished by the feelings she had. Who was she to tell her what to do or where to go? Besides, why should she care?

Despite feeling that those thoughts were out of place, she couldn't deny she felt… she felt… jealous? No, that was impossible, right?

"Who is the girl?" the question came out of her mouth before she could stop it.

Fate took a few seconds to answer, she wasn't sure why, but she felt strange talking about that with Nanoha.

"She… is a very good friend of Schach Noel" although they hadn't been out with her, on several occasions Fate had mentioned her name, so it wasn't unknown to Nanoha.

"Uuummm… and how is the 'story' with her?"

"There's no…"

"Story? Yes, you already said that. But there had to be something for you to be the guest of honor." she said with some sarcasm.

"That's an exaggeration of Arf, I'm sure it's not that way. Chances are that she just asked for me and Arf took it as an invitation."

Nanoha had to wait a few minutes before speaking again, to be able to calm her exasperation.

"I think the important thing is now how, but who." she finally said trying to soften her voice. She wasn't sure why, but she needed to know what had happened.

"Yes… that's true." now it was Fate who needed a moment before starting to talk. "Carim was Noel's first stable partner. They were together for three years and they broke up because she had to go overseas. They offered her an excellent job in a multinational corporation and she didn't hesitate to accept it. Despite the drama that resulted from it, they ended in good terms. Sometime later, she returned for some time to do a job here and she stayed at Noel's house, as friends. We would meet, and go out whenever we could, everything like before, with the only difference that they were no longer together. In fact they would each flirt their own way. But it all changed the moment Carim began to show signs that she liked me. At first I was caught by surprise and didn't know how to respond, she is a very beautiful woman, intelligent and it really is… hard not to notice her… but even though Noel said she didn't care, I knew it wasn't true, I knew she still felt things for Carim and I couldn't… I couldn't reciprocate her feeling knowing that Noel was involved. So I talked to her and told her I couldn't, that she also would be leaving in a few weeks and that I didn't want to get my hopes up with a relationship that had no future whatsoever. I didn't want to expose Noel, so I excused myself with that story.

Sometime after Carim left, Noel told me that she was still in love with Carim and that although she knew there was no possibility of getting back together with her or anything like that, it would have been very difficult for her, almost unbearable, to see me with her. That if it would have been anyone else she wouldn't have minded it so much, but that with me it was different."

"Why?"

"Because with me, there was a real possibility of her falling in love. Or at least that's what she thought."

"And you?... would you had fallen in love?"

"Maybe" she said after a pause and looking lost in her thoughts as if remembering.

That answer made Nanoha's heart skip a beat and her throat became dry. She didn't want to hear any more. She couldn't bear to hear any more, so she left the conversation there with the excuse that they had continue with their work.

Both stayed thoughtful the remainder of the day. Nanoha tried to get her emotions under control. She felt restless, anxious, angry, but she couldn't understand why she was having all those feelings. While Fate, couldn't think of anything other than what she would find on the party that night.

Talking with Nanoha about Carim, made her remember how good she felt with her the time they went out. She was very beautiful and feminine, with long straight blond hair, a curvy body well toned by the constant exercise, blue eyes and a mouth that exuded sensuality, tempting even the most celibate person on earth. In addition, her security and certainty in her work had gotten her a high position and to be respected by all her peers. In short, she could be considered the ideal woman for anyone. Would she have any change? Did _she _ want to have any change with Carim? She would only get the answers after seeing her again that night. She didn't want to have any expectations, but she couldn't help it.

* * *

The night passed slow and agonizing for Nanoha. Sitting in front of the TV constantly changing channels, her mind was in chaos. Images of Fate laughing and embracing some one else, had her restless and irritated. It was ridiculous to feel that way, but it was even more ridiculous to try to deceive herself and pretend that nothing was happening. But how to deal with the fact that she was being disturbed by a woman, how to deal with the things Fate provoked on her, emotions and feelings that so far she only felt for Yuuno. How to deal with something she thought had just been temporary so many years ago, something fleeting, was been reborn once again. It wasn't possible. It couldn't be possible.

Without thinking it one more minute she decided to go out for a drink, she needed to get out of there and entertain her mind on other things to not think anymore about it. When she was about to leave she heard the keys in the door. "Yuuno!". She waited in the room in front of the mirror for a moment, she didn't know if she felt relieved by his arrival or if on the contrary, she felt more disturbed.

Yuuno came into the room, approached her and took her by the shoulders. At that moment he felt Nanoha trembling.

"Nanoha" he rushed to her side. "What's wrong?"

Nanoha avoided looking at him at first, but when doing so, she knew his presence was a great relief, that having him there with her, feeling his hands, looking into his eyes told her that everything was alright. Without a word, she embraced him and let his warmth and touch to reassure her. As her shaking subsided, she felt the urgent need to relief herself, her emotions wouldn't leave her alone and at that moment Yuuno was her only way out.

* * *

At the party, all the guests were at Noel's house with Shari, her partner, as hostess, since the flight was delayed Carim hadn't yet arrived. This delay helped Fate clear her mind a bit and to realize that actually, all she wanted was to have relief nights, with no ties, no commitments, no demands. The only detail was that this wasn't her style and she definitely, had no face to propose something like that to Carim even if she had the chance, so she dismissed any thought of a "maybe".

An hour and a half later than planned, Carim arrived at the party with Shari. Due to the bad mood she had arrived in for the delay, Shari had to tell her about the welcome party, which until then she had been led to believe hadn't been planned, so when she arrived, the whoop of SURPRISE! Was more for the guests than for her, however, she thanked for their presence and the wait.

Much later, Carim and Fate had only exchanged a handshake. Carim was meeting with every group of friends but being careful not to go near Fate, the latter was aware of this attitude, which she seconded to avoid discomfort. Arf invited her to go with her, but Fate felt it wasn't the time, so she didn't.

After finishing her beer, she went to the bathroom. As she washed her hands and face someone knocked on the door. She said she was busy, to which the person responded by knocking harder, Fate, a little annoyed rushed and opened the door rather abruptly.

"You can com…" she stopped when noticing it was Carim.

Seeing Fate's surprised face, Carim smiled like a child when he makes a prank, taking the tip of her index finger to her mouth.

"Sorry, but it's urgent." she said with a shrug.

"Yes… aah, come in." she was quick to step aside to let her pass.

Carim came in, but when Fate was about to leave, she shut the door and stood blocking it. They looked into each other's eyes for a moment before Carim broke the silence.

"It's been a long time." she said reflectively.

"Yes" Fate seconded her unable to prevent being nervous.

Carim looked at her up and down devouring every part of her body. Fate reacted swallowing hard and blushing a little, however, she also admired every inch of Carim's body with the same effrontery. When their eyes met again, Carim slightly smiled before starting to approach her, until they were face to face with their lips almost touching. Anticipation caused them to half-open them and only a few seconds later came the kiss. Soft at first, but lust and fiery at the end.

Fate's body instantly reacted, her center and breasts burned with the heat that invaded her, and for some minutes, fleeting minutes, Fate completely forgot where they were. Her hands anxiously searched, caressing Carim's back under her shirt, feeling the shudder caused by her touch was all it took to unleash her desires.

With no opposition whatsoever, she took the cotton blouse she was wearing off, removed her bra and showered with kisses her nipples now hardened by the passion. Carim's moans didn't took long to come out, feeling how Fate's lips swept her nipples and how they were pressed against them, plucked from her mouth expressions of pleasure. From the moment she knew she was coming back, Carim dreamed of this meeting. Years before, when the attraction towards Fate had been present, she had the illusion to make her fall for her and convince her to go with her. She was head over heels for her, she didn't know where that attraction had come from, especially because she was friends with Noel, detail which she knew would be a problem, but that's how it was, she liked her, she captivated her, and most of all, she awakened the desire and even the most remote fantasy from her mind.

When she arrived at the party, she had to stay away from Fate to avoid jumping on her and making love to her right there in front of everyone. She had to wait until everyone's attention was no longer on top of her and so be able approach Fate, hence when noticing she was going to the bathroom, with no hesitation she rushed to follow her.

The self control of both was almost nonexistent, just a hint of rationality made Fate stop everything with extreme difficulty. She had to use all her will to stop kissing those so succulent breasts, and not to give in to the temptation of kissing her and feeling the rest of her body at that very moment.

"Wait…" she managed to say between gasps and burying her face in Carim's neck.

"Wait for what? Haven't we wait long enough?" she eagerly spoke, moving one of her legs in between Fate's as she kissed her neck and shoulder.

"Yes but…" that mouth was driving her crazy and being celibate for so long didn't help. "This is not the place…" she said slowly getting separated from her. "Not here."

Carim closed her eyes for a moment and took a deep breath.

"You're right… this is not the place."

Reluctantly, she straightened her bra as Fate handed her her shirt.

"Come with me tonight" Carim proposed. "Let's go, now"

"Not today." she replied slightly smiling taking her hand. "Today… you must be tired." Carim was about to reply, but Fate beat her. "I'm tired, I have work tomorrow and... I definitely want this to happen with no limits… nor physical, or of time."

Carim looked into her eyes for a few seconds trying to see the truth of her words. She was afraid that when getting out of there, Fate would regret what happened.

"Then… tomorrow?" she asked concealing the fear of refusal.

Fate got close to kiss her lips once, twice, three times.

"Tomorrow" she assured her.

They got out separately to disguise that they came from the same place and each took a different direction.

Fate stood for a while in the balcony of the apartment to reflect on what had happened while drinking another beer. She couldn't believe what had happened, but also couldn't deny that she liked it. Having her so close, feeling her lips and feeling her breasts pressed against hers had been the spark needed to turn on her entire body. It was obvious that she had to release all her _accumulated energy_, it was urgent that she did, so why not with Carim when it was clear that she was more than willing.

Immersed in thought, she didn't realize that Arf was beside her, so she was startled when she spoke.

"You are very thoughtful!"

"Huh?… No, I was just watching the night." she said avoiding looking at her for too long.

"I see" she said after a moment, with a half smile on her lips.

"What's so funny about it?"

"Nothing. The funny thing is seeing the smudge lipstick on your face." she said pointing to the corner of her mouth.

Fate immediately began to wipe her mouth with her hand while Arf let out a laugh. At that moment she realized she had fallen for the oldest trick in the world, so she closed her eyes and smiled shaking her head.

"So the bathroom was pretty lively." Arf said still smiling.

Fate chose to drink some beer. Arf had discovered her, but that didn't mean she had to give details.

"I'm happy for you. It was about time." before leaving she got close to her ear to tell her something "And don't worry, no one noticed the absence of both of you." when Fate turned to face her, she winked and went to speak with Hayate.

During the rest of the party, Fate and Carim spent the night normally, once in a while sharing a knowing look with one another, but always making sure that it wasn't apparent to others. Keeping everything to themselves.

The next day, Fate arrived at the office a little later than what she's used to. Nanoha was already there taking her morning coffee.

"Hi, good morning." she said as if in a hurry. "Is Mr. Nakajima here yet"

"Not yet, don't worry, want some coffee?" she asked as she watched her arranging her things.

"Yes please, I need a large cup." she told her in a tone of supplication.

"I can imagine:" she said with some irony that Fate didn't catch.

When giving her the coffee she could see a different glow in her eyes. It was like, excitement? Nervousness? What had happened last night? She had the urge to ask, but decided it was best to wait for her to tell her. The only detail was that it was noon came and Fate hadn't yet made any references to the party and on the other hand, she looked distracted and thoughtful. Neither of them brought lunch, so they ordered food from the cafeteria and ate in the office.

"This pasta is good!" Fate commented surprised. It wasn't common for the food from there to be good.

"Yes, we were lucky." she slightly smiled.

"It's a good thing because I was really hungry."

"After going out partying last night, it's normal." she spoke casually but with the full intention of bringing up the subject.

"Well, it wasn't the whole night, but still it hit me a little."

"And how was it? How did it go?"

"Very well." she smiled. "We were there until 3 am. Carim's flight was delayed an hour, but we still had a great time."

"And… how was the reunion of you two?"

Upon hearing the question, she couldn't help remembering the fiery and passionate moment in the bathroom, so her face turned a deep shade of red.

"Good, good." was what she managed to say. "It was… good."

Nanoha knew how to recognize when Fate didn't want to talk about a topic, and that was one of them.

"Yuuno arrived last night."

"He did?" she was surprised, since for what she remembered that wasn't the weekend he was supposed to retuned.

"Yes, he surprised me."

"Good. I'm happy for you." she honestly told her. "It had been some time since he last came."

"Almost a month, but now he's staying for two weeks straight."

"Wow, that's even better."

"In fact, I think I'm going to ask for a few days off to go on a trip with him. But, I don't know, I'm still thinking about it." during the morning, she had been thinking that a vacation with Yuuno was what they needed to reconnect and so take out of her head all those thoughts about Fate. She couldn't afford feeling those things for her. She was a married woman, no matter the distance they had, he was her husband, so it was necessary to restore the harmony between them.

"I think you should talk with Nakajima today, why wait?"

"If I leave, it would mean leaving you with all the work for at least a week."

"It's fine with me. I'm not going to die for just one week." she replied with a shrug.

"Do you really want me to leave that bad?" the question came out unintentionally. At another time she wouldn't have care so much insistence, but right now that Carim was there, it seemed a little strange to her.

"What are you talking about?" she frowned, not understanding. "I just want you to take advantage of the opportunity to fix things with Yuuno."

"I know. Sorry, it's just that… I'm afraid it might not work." she lied.

"Don't worry. I'm sure that wherever you go, it'll be okay."

They both smiled, however, each one was struggling with their own torment. Fate fighting to control her nervousness, last night everything had been easier, but today, being aware of what would happened had her nerves out of control. On the other hand, when seeing Nanoha, she felt a sense of guilt which wasn't expected, it was like spending the night with Carim meant cheating on her. It was absurd to feel that way, no matter how much she told herself that there was no reason for feeling that, every minute that passed it got worse.

When hearing that Yuuno had come home, she felt relieved at first. With Carim present, the routine wouldn't be the same, so with him there, Nanoha wouldn't be alone after work, and if they went on a trip, it was even better. The only detail was that it also meant she wouldn't be seeing her, and although it was the best thing to do so she could get her complete attention on Carim and discover the implications of being together, it was also hard to break away from Nanoha.

Nanoha spoke with Nakajima to get an advance of one week from her vacations, she showed him the progress in the current project and how little affect it would have on the first due date scheduled. Nakajima approved the week a little reluctant, however, the year before Nanoha had worked with no vacations and didn't complaint, so he had no face to deny those days.

When she and Fate took their leave, the lump in the throat and the sharp pain in the chest that both felt, left them shocked, so much, that it took them some time to reach their respective destinations and gain control over their emotions.

Fate was going straight to the hotel where Carim was staying, she had sent her the address and the room number by mail in the morning. In the message it was implied that she expected her to stay the whole weekend, to which Fate answered with a "we'll see". She didn't want to commit without knowing if in fact the passion and lust felt the night before had been a product of the moment, the alcohol and the time spent without being intimate with someone, rather than the chemistry and affinity between them.

However, having the thoughts so divided among Carim and Nanoha, she decided that no matter what happened, she didn't want to spend the weekend alone, so she headed to the room convinced that she wouldn't leave that place until Monday morning.

She knocked on the door. Nothing. She knocked again. Nothing. When she was about to leave, the door opened leaving only a small gap in sight. Fate slowly opened it seeing everything was dark inside. She entered, closed the door behind her and took three steps forward. She couldn't see anything, the curtains didn't even let a single ray of light in and no matter how much she tried, her eyes wouldn't adjust. "Carim!" she called but got no answer, she just felt a pair of hands around her waist and a leg that slipped between hers. Feeling that made her smiled. She reached her hands backwards grabbing Carim's hips and receiving the surprise that she was completely naked.

She tried to turn around, but Carim stopped her by pressing herself against her and whispering to her ear.

"I want you naked… now!" and without further ado, she ripped her clothes off and took her to the bed ending on top of Fate.

She licked her lips with her tongue, gave her short kisses until Fate parted her lips and their tongues met. Although she was trying to take things slowly, the desire and need took over the moment, so they gave in to passion.

Carim devoured Fate's breast, she licked them, pressed them to her lips and massaged them until she heard how the accelerated and labored breathing turned into moans. She continued her journey towards the south until she reached her sex carefully shaved, leaving only a row of hairs. She kissed those flushed lips, her crotch, her inner thigh, she breathed on top of the point of pleasure without touching it causing Fate to become desperate.

"P-ple… aseee…" she begged while raising her hips to achieve the longed contact.

Carim didn't need to be asked twice and covered all her sex with her mouth. She tasted the juices that came out and were proof of the great arousal. She passed her tongue over the opening promising to enter, she sucked her clit until she made Fate scream. When she felt that the climax was near, she let her breath and mover up to her mouth again.

Fate flipped her around taking over control and so managing to look down and enjoy the beautiful body before her, the darkness was no longer a problem so her fingers began to softly caress down Carim's stomach making her jump by the tickling. When she was about to reach her sex, she flipped around again but this time ending with Carim's knees on her face and so allowing her full vision of her bright and flushed sex. With her thump she swept through her intimacy, lubricating and heating it further. She gave circular strokes to her clit making Carim grab from the wall to avoid falling down from the pleasure. At that moment she attacked her with her tongue, making her scream and to start moving her hips out of control.

Fate grabbed her butt, preventing her from moving away from her and began a dance with her lips and tongue that left Carim breathless. As much as she tried to delay the orgasm, she couldn't help to grasp Fate's head and pressed it more against her. She wanted her inside, which Fate understood and introduced her tongue as deep as she could inside her. In doing so, the orgasm exploded inside Carim making her scream loudly and that the shivers in her body became uncontrollable. Fate continued with the in and out of her tongue and followed it with quick movements with her thumb on her clit, which snatched another intense orgasm from Carim.

Almost breathless, she settled down on top of Fate, she spread her legs until she could hit her sex and rub her clit. She was so wet that the slipping in was immediate and the sensations multiplied. It wasn't long before both exploded and flood the room with moans and screams of ecstasy. Carim lay down embracing Fate to rest for a while before continuing with their session.

That's how they spent the whole weekend, sleeping, having sex, eating and when their bodies would no longer respond, they watched TV. And although there wasn't much time left to think, always before falling sleep, Fate's last thought was Nanoha, how was she? Was she happy with Yuuno? Where did they go?

It was already Sunday afternoon. They were laying down watching TV and enjoying a basket of fruit. Carim was feeding Fate in many ways, with the fork she place the fruit on her lips for Fate to take it from there or from any other place in her body that the fruit allowed it. The other way around, Carim's favorite place to eat was Fate's neck, the valley of her breast, and her navel.

"I could become addicted to you." she told her after taking a strawberry from Fate's lips.

"Really?"

"Uhum! If I could stay the whole month here with you, I swear I would."

Fate smiled and looked down for a moment before speaking. "So you're only staying for a month."

Carim tensed up a little. From the beginning she had it clear that whatever it was that happened with Fate, her stay would only be for one month, since that was the time the training given to the new staff lasted. But she had been so focused on achieving being with Fate that she hadn't thought that maybe she wasn't interested in a temporary relationship, with no commitment or promises of any kind. If she still lived there, she would not hesitate to commit to her, it was a fact that they were more than attracted to each other, which for Carim it was something of great importance, and for the rest part, the little or much she knew of her, she liked. But that was not the case, they lived in different countries and she definetily wasn't thinking of leaving her job or requesting a transfer, and she knew that Fate, after her last experience, wouldn't change from city or job to follow someone.

"Sorry, I should have told you…" she took a deep breath. "I can't offer you more than this." she told her knowing that maybe, with that statement, all the magic from those two days would end. "I can't stay, Fate. My life is not here."

Fate stayed silent for a moment. Carim thought she was probably thinking of ways to send her off without being rude, so trying to avoid the awkward moment she decided to speak first.

"I'm sorry Fate, really." she was about to get up when she felt Fate's hand retaining her in the bed. When turning around, she saw her approaching to kiss her.

"I also, can't offer you more than this." she said looking into her eyes. Carim narrowed her eyes as sign of not understanding. "I don't want a relationship, I'm not ready for it. I feel really good being with you that's for sure, but… for now I couldn't give you more than what I'm already are."

Carim was silent. The last thing she expected was that response from her, so she didn't know how to react. Fate approached her once again and kissed her, first short kisses and then passionately, making Carim forget about the matter. Deep inside, Fate was struggling with the idea of temporary intimacy without commitment, but she knew she couldn't have anything more for the moment, not only due to Carim's departure, but also because of her thoughts towards Nanoha were becoming more frequent and that worried her. She didn't want to make her life any more complicated, but she suspected that her interest in her was heading towards dangerous roads.

That night she went home to get clothes for the week, she was determined to spend her time and energy on Carim. She would take advantage of every hour and every minute they had to be together.

During that time they didn't heard much from the other girls, Fate was a little worried about Noel's reaction. Although now she was with Shari and they already had 2 years living together, she wasn't sure she wouldn't care, after all, Carim had been Noel's first love.

The next weekend, they all agreed to go out dancing together. They talked, remembered old times and dance till they drop. The tense moment of the night was when Noel asked to speak with Carim, alone. However, it didn't took them long, because all she wanted was to ensure that she wouldn't hurt Fate, she wanted to make sure she had spoken with her about her departure and that she wasn't raising her hopes in vain. In Carim's words.

"She's more interested in you than in me." she smiled in disbelief.

Then Monday came and Nanoha returned. The night before Fate decided to go to sleep at home with the excuse that she had to give the final touches to a project that was due that day, however, the truth was different. Her nerves had her really sensitive, the butterflies in her stomach wouldn't let her eat anything and the idea that it was all caused by the thought that she was going to be seeing Nanoha again, worried her even more.

She arrived at the office early as usual, but this time, Nanoha was already there.

"Morning" greeted her a smiling Nanoha. "I surprised you, right? Nyahaha"

"_More than you think" _she thought. "Well yes, I thought that today of all days you were going to be late." she smiled.

"Come here and give me a hug." she said getting up from her desk.

Fate got closer and hugged her. What she felt, left her paralyzed. She became aware of her whole body, the smell of her hair and her perfume, the warmth of her skin and she was especially aware of how her heart beat fast for having her so close. She tried to breathe deeply to slow it down, but it didn't work.

"Tell me! How has everything been around here?"

Fate didn't answer, she couldn't. The lump in her throat prevented her. She couldn't believe it. It couldn't be happening again. Nanoha was not only her workmate but she was also straight and overall, she was married. What the hell was she thinking.

"Fate!"

"Ah?... Yeah, sorry. I'm kind of still sleepy." she excused herself.

"And it's only Monday! God, I can't imagine how your weekend was." she said with a tone of pity.

"It's not because of that. It's just that last night I stayed until late working on the project. Today is the first due date."

"Want to check it?"

"Sure. That would be nice"

Fate needed to fix her mind on something else that wasn't Nanoha, the problem was that she didn't think that when doing the checking, she would sit so close to her to see the computer monitor.

With great difficulty at first, Fate showed her everything she had done with the project. They corrected some things and added others, until the due time came. During that time, she managed to regain control over her emotions. It was clear that she liked Nanoha more than just physically, as she had thought before, however, it was necessary, urgent, to take off that insanity of her head. The problem was, how?

At lunchtime she couldn't refuse to go eat together with Nanoha, they always did, so there was no reason not to do it now.

"It was great, Fate, on Friday when I arrived home to get ready to leave for the first place we found, it turned out that Yuuno had everything already arranged to recreate our honeymoon. The hotel, the same room, our first breakfast as newly wed." she spoke with excitement. "Everything… he didn't miss a thing. I must say I was very surprised and it managed to get us reconnected again."

"That was the idea, right?" she smiled, trying to hide the emptiness she felt in her stomach.

"Yes. That was the idea, just that it exceeded my expectations."

"I'm glad to hear that." she couldn't meet her eyes, so she looked around for a bit to avoid her.

"He even told me that he is intending to work one more year full-time as a pilot and then he would try to work part time and be able to spend more time with me."

"Then you just have to be a little patient."

"Yes well, that's going to be a little difficult. After this wonderful week, it will be very hard to return to the long absences."

"Think that a year goes by really fast." she tried to give support.

"I guess you're right. But that's enough of me, and you, how have you been? What did you do in my absence?"

"Not much. Work and…" what was she supposed to say?

"And…?" she asked with uncertainty.

"Spend time with Carim" she said without hesitation. After all, she had no reason to feel embarrassed or guilty about it. But deep down, that's how she felt.

For a second she thought she saw a different shadow in Nanoha's look, but it didn't last long enough for her to figure it out.

"So… now there's story?" she spoke casually but with her lips a little tensed.

"Yes" she nodded.

"And… Noel?"

"Well. She had no problem with it this time." _what is that expression on Nanoha's face? Is it possible that…? Don't think stupid thinks Fate, she's just uncomfortable with the subject. _she thought.

"So you're dating?"

"Yeah…"

"Mmm… and Arf? What about the girls?" she abruptly changed the subject.

"They're fine. We went out this weekend and had a great time."

"I can imagine." she smiled.

At that moment Fate's phone rang. "Hello… good and you?... Yes, yes." she said softly and smiling. "… I'm sorry, I was working with Nanoha and then the due time came and I forgot about the time…"

As the conversation progressed, Nanoha pretended to be aware of her surrounding, but the truth was that she was listening to every word, the tone of voice in which she talked and even the gestures of Fate. A blast of jealousy immediately invaded her, which became more intense when she heard her say to not to worry, that she would stay with her that week again. _"Again? AGAIN? So that's what she meant when she said she spent time with Carim._" she thought.

Nanoha suddenly felt sick, so she excused herself and went into the bathroom locking herself in one of the cubicles. She took deep breaths trying to control her stomach. Flashing images of Fate with another woman flooded her mind making the walls in the small space spin. She hurried out into the sink to splash some water on her face.

It was true that the week with Yuuno had been wonderful, but it was equally true that she hadn't spent a day without thinking of Fate. The worst had been the night she dreamed about her, the night when she felt her lips and her hands all over her body and woke up whishing it was true. The confusion had been greater, since never, not even as a teenager and with the crazy hormones, did she ever had fantasies or dreams of this kind with another woman, her imagination had come only to want to kiss her neighbor, but nothing more, so this was new and, frightening.

"God, Nanoha! This has to stop!" she said in despair and looking in the mirror. But the jealousy was eating her, she just wanted to go out and tell her not to go with Carim, that she couldn't do that to her. But what exactly was she doing to her? If they were nothing, they couldn't be, she wasn't even gay! What right did she had to ask or demand anything from her? Let alone, after having returned from her second honeymoon.

She left the bathroom determined to overcome all that nonsense. Fate was a great person and friend, so she deserved to be with someone who could give her everything she needed and wanted, she had no right to feel that way.

"I order you a coffee." Fate told her after she sat down.

"Thanks" she smiled. "And… are you in trouble?" she wanted to change the subject, but she couldn't with the curiosity she had.

"Why?" she asked strangely.

"For being here with me." she shrugged.

"She has no reason be mad." she said, frowning and slightly shaking her head.

"Thanks for the complement." she whispered.

"Wait… it's not that you don't attract me." she quickly said realizing that Nanoha had misinterpreted it all, the detail was that she didn't think before speaking and what she said was even more compromising "It's not that you're not attractive, that's what I meant…" she tried to fix it when seeing Nanoha's expression of surprise. "… It's just that Carim knows you're married." Fate only looked into her eyes. While in the inside she was dying, she tried to stay firm when speaking.

"Yes… I am" she spoke in a faint voice after a few seconds. For the first time in her life she wished it wasn't like that. The swirl of emotions went wild. The uneasiness washed over her.

For a moment she felt the urge to tell her, to shout! That she wanted her, she wanted her to make her hers and so forget about Yuuno and Carim, but out of nowhere came the waiter with the coffee and prevented her from doing it. After he left, each one got absorbed in their thoughts, the silence became dense until Fate took the opportunity to change the subject to a more trivial one and so return to the relative normalcy.

The rest of the afternoon each one devoted to their own work. They were too conflicted to speak. Nanoha trying to stop what she was feeling for Fate and the latter, thinking that the silence and the elusiveness of Nanoha were due to her impulsive phrase "It's not that you don't attract me." What the hell was she thinking when she said that. Surely she was now afraid to treat her or do anything that might encourage the attraction… But how to tell her that there was no need to do anything, that her mere presence was enough to remind her every minute that she liked her, the she fascinated her and aroused in her feelings, emotions and desires that she thought she had lost in her last relationship.

That night, they tried to clear their thoughts with sex, but to the chagrin of both, their minds betrayed them, making them see in the face of their lovers the face of each other. With every kiss and every touch, the illusion of being together became more alive, more real and in turn, more tormenting, especially when falling in the fact that nothing was true. Nanoha ended up crying in silence so Yuuno wouldn't notice and Fate, ended faking an orgasm than never came, just like the sleep and relief.

To Be Continued…

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**A/N: **So what did you guy think about it, did you hate it? loved it? Well next chapter is going to be REALLY good, I assure you, there is going to be more NanoFate action and a lot of drama. So look forward to it, I'll try to update it this week also so, see ya next time :)


	5. It Will Never Be Her And I

**A/N: **So here's chapter 5, kind of late, but i finally finished it. Hope you like it, please read and review!

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"It Will Never Be Her and I"

The days at work were spent avoiding falling into personal matters and avoiding direct physical contact, and at night, they tried to give life to a mask that since the beginning had been broken.

Both Yuuno and Carim, had noticed the difference between what was lived before and what they were living now, but neither of them had talked about it, since they thought that it was all due to their respective departures. By having nothing different to offer, they decided to stay silent and let it go.

Yuuno, left once again, and Nanoha stayed alone as always. Fate wanted to go back to some of the activities they always did in the evenings to fill the void a bit, but she always put an excuse to all of them, so she understood that the problem was that she didn't want to spend more time with her.

They were devastated, but none dared to talk. There was too much to lose if they confessed their true feelings. There was too much to face if they accepted what their hearts were telling them.

Signum's birthday came and they decided to go out dancing. Of course, Arf insisted that Nanoha went out with them, although she didn't say it, she knew that Nanoha was depressed and this was the perfect occasion to distract her. Being all together for the first time in weeks, Arf could see the cold and distant treatment between Nanoha and Fate. She observed how they avoided any eye contact with each other, touching in any way, and above all, how they looked at each other when they thought no one saw them.

She knew what it all meant, she knew there was a big disaster to come, but she also knew that it was too late to stop it. Fate had fallen in love, she knew her very well and there was no doubt. Nanoha… Nanoha was another story. In love? She couldn't assure it. Tempted? Attracted? With the feeling to venture into the unknown? Sure. So all that remained was to wait for it to happen and then pick up the broken pieces.

Nanoha had drunk more than usual, the image of Fate with Carim together, holding hands, hugging or kissing, were driving her crazy, so she sought the easiest way out of her problem. But it all got complicated when she accepted to dance with a stranger. Arf tried to persuade her not to, but she wouldn't listen. As expected, the stranger not only wanted to dance, as soon as she could she moved closer to her and wrapped her arms around her. Nanoha, who was so into the music didn't notice anything until she felt a pair of lips in her neck, when she tried to react, a pair of hands grabbed the stranger by the shoulders and pulled her back. She protested against this action, but after some unintelligible words, due to the music, she left. When she managed to see who had done it she found before her a Fate she didn't know. Her eyes were cold, but at the same time transmitting rage, anger, but even so, she took her by the arm, firmly, but without hurting her and dragged her to the bathroom.

Once inside, they looked into each other's eyes for the first time in the night and in seconds all the barriers and defenses they had been creating for weeks, collapsed. Without taking her eyes off her, Fate drew herself closer to her until she was just inches away from her mouth. She stayed that way for a few seconds giving Nanoha the chance to get away if that's what she wanted. When she didn't, Fate closed the distance between them and she kissed her.

She joined her lips with hers and slowly began to caress them, enjoying their softness and warmth. She parted her lips as if asking permission to deepen the kiss and the response was immediate. Nanoha also opened her mouth and her tongue went in to meet with hers.

They danced in perfect harmony. The effect of the drinks on Nanoha didn't compare with the intoxication from that kiss. Everything around them disappeared leaving them to the pleasure of the moment.

The knock on the door brought them back to reality making them separate instantly. They stared at each other without saying a word. A second knock made Fate react.

"We'll be out in a second!" she shouted, but she couldn't more a single muscle in her body.

A third knock made Nanoha open the door and get out, leaving Fate there.

"Are you coming out?" asked an annoyed voice.

Fate just left without even looking at who was talking to her. When she got to where everybody was, Nanoha was saying goodbye giving as excuse that she had drunk too much and that it was best if she went home.

"It would be better if we go with you, you're a little drunk." Hayate said with concern.

"No, there's no need, I'm fine really. With the shock of the dance floor I assure you I'm more sober than when I arrived."

"That might be true, but we won't have to worry as much if we go with you."

"Really, it's okay. I thank you but… it's not necessary."

Without giving them any more chance to talk, she threw a kiss in the air to all and left. During the whole time, she avoided looking at Fate.

She got in her car and put her hands and forehead on the steering wheel. She still felt Fate's lips on her own. Still tasted the flavor of Fate in her mouth. Now that it wasn't a dream, an illusion… now that she knew how it felt, all she wanted was for it to be repeated again and again.

Seconds or minutes passed, she didn't know, she only looked up when she felt a tap on the window, which frightened her. The surprise was greater when she saw it was Fate. She couldn't react. Fate opened the car door and said softly but firmly.

"I'll drive."

Nanoha didn't argue, she moved to the other seat and stared at Fate. After getting in, Fate stared back and without saying a word she slowly approached Nanoha, who immediately began shake. Fate stretched one of her hands around her until she reached the seat belt and put it on her. When taking the position to begin driving, Nanoha let out the air she was holding in her lungs.

They remained silent the whole time, until it was finally broken when they reached an interception in which of going left, they would arrive at Nanoha's house and of going right they would go to Fate's. The light indicating left turned green, to which Nanoha refused with a gently "no", making Fate take the opposite way.

They arrived at Fate's apartment and the silence still reigned. Nanoha was shaking from head to toes and Fate, just tried to find the courage and strength to not break, knowing in advance what would happen. She knew that the next morning, Nanoha would wake up with great remorse and would leave trying to pretend that nothing had happened. But though she knew the script of the play, she couldn't let her go now. Not after feeling her, not having the possibility of making love to her at least once.

She took her hand and caressed it for a few minutes, then she led her to her room. Once there, she slowly ran the tip of her fingers down Nanoha's arms, going from her shoulders to her wrists and then back up. There she accompanied the delicate caress with soft kisses which produced a light moan in Nanoha.

She continued her journey to the neck, her chin, her earlobe, her eyes… her nose and finally… her mouth. At this point, Nanoha's breathing was accelerated and her hands were clinging to Fate's hair.

They kissed slowly and deeply. For Fate, those lips where heaven, not too large or too small. Well delineated and so soft, it would be impossible for her to ever want another mouth as much as she wanted that one. For Nanoha, those lips made her lose track of everything, even, lose track of who she was.

They kissed for many minutes, minutes that seemed like hours, minutes in which they discovered how perfectly their tongues molded with each other while dancing together.

With a gentle push, Fate took Nanoha up to the bed, she grabbed her with one of her arms and laid her down balancing her weight with her other hand to not fall on her. She ventured to place one of her legs in between Nanoha's legs, she put slight pressure on her sex causing another moan to come out of those lips that she couldn't help but enjoy.

Several minutes passed before Fate decided to explore her neck. That floral scent and the smoothness of her skin made her crazy. With her lips, she caressed her and slightly bit her making her shiver. She dared to place her hand on one of her breast, which by time was already had, and began to massage it which further accelerated their breathing.

After a few minutes, the shirt became a nuisance, so she carefully and very gently, removed her shirt and beautiful pink and white bra she was wearing. For a moment she saw the doubt in Nanoha's eyes, but when she was about to get up and leave everything there, Nanoha stopped her and pulled her toward her again.

For Nanoha, those hands touched her like no one had done before, her lips adored her with excessive sweetness and her tongue tasted her like the best gourmet dishes.

When Fate removed her pants and caressed her legs with her fingers and lips, she almost took her to heaven. It took all of her self-control to not faint from all the pleasure she was feeling, control that she lost when feeling Fate's tongue on her sex.

Fate gently ran her tongue over her flushed sex, tasting every part of her, and when she reached the opening, she only touched it with the tip of her tongue without pressure, she just licked it as if it was an ice cream. Nanoha's hips moved without control, seeking for some pressure against the object of torture and pleasure that had her prisoner. When she finally reached her clit, the explosion that she felt made her scream and tremble. She let herself to be completely taken by all the feelings she was experiencing. She arrived once, twice, three times to ecstasy, she couldn't and didn't want to avoid it, her body and mind were no longer hers, they now belonged to Fate.

For Fate, that body was like a temple. A temple to which adore, hence that her own needs became secondary. No matter how much she could want her, how much she needed to be touch by her, she knew it wouldn't happen so she couldn't afford to dream about it, she could only treasure every second, every minute lived and prepare herself for Nanoha's inevitable regret.

Despite the constant struggle against sleep and wanting to watch over Nanoha, Fate finally lost the battle, leaving her arms around her.

The next morning she found the empty space in her bed. She didn't have to open her eyes to know that Nanoha was gone. Her scent was still on the pillow, on the sheets, on her own skin, but she was no longer there. A single tear ran down her cheek when she opened her eyes.

When Nanoha opened her eyes and saw Fate next to her, she remembered every one of the moments spent with her that night. Every touch, every kiss, every hug. But she also remembered the madness it all meant. What would she tell her after this? How would she face her? What would happen now? On the other hand, she thought of Yuuno, how could she do such a thing after the wonderful second honey moon they spent together? How could she be with him again without feeling like she betrayed him? The doubts, the reproach and guilt invaded her so much that she couldn't resist being there for another minute. Quietly she got dressed and left.

During the day she wanted to call her, to talk to her, but the fear to the unknown made her back down. It wasn't until the night that she managed to control her nerves and call her. She didn't know what she would say, but she needed to hear her.

"_Hello!"_ Arf answered.

"Hi Arf, it's Nanoha"

"_Hi Nanoha, how are you? Do you feel better?"_

"Why do you ask?" she cautiously said. _"She couldn't have told her"_ she thought.

"_Well, last night you drank a little too much."_

"Yeah right, that's true." she spoke with relief. "I'm fine. Thanks for your concern."

"_I didn't call you during the day because I was busy, you know." _she said laughing.

"Yes, I can imagine." she also smiled. "Arf… is Fate there?"

"_Nope. She left me a note saying she wouldn't be back until tomorrow."_

Nanoha's stomach squeezed hard, taking her breath away for a moment.

"She's with Carim, I suppose." she said trying to sound calm and casual, but without much success.

"_Well, yeah"_

"Well… ahm… I'll see her on Monday then. Talk to you later, bye"

Before she could answer, she hung up. Immediately tears invaded her eyes, a sharp pain stuck on her chest and a sense of betrayal, of having been used took over her.

On the other side of the line, Arf hung up and a question was immediately heard.

"Did she believe it?"

"Seems like it" Arf answered turning to Fate.

"And… how did you hear her?"

"I guess upset, surprised… I don't Fate, what do you want me to tell you?" Arf answered with a tired tone.

Fate raised her hands to her face. She knew that at that moment Nanoha was thinking many things of her, but she didn't want to listen to the same thing again, she couldn't hear the same speech she had heard once before. She couldn't hear her saying that being with her had being a big mistake. She knew she wouldn't help replying by saying that it didn't matter, that she wouldn't be expecting anything form her, to just let her be there for her. So she decided it best to act as if everything had been due to the alcohol.

Carim had called, but after being with Nanoha she couldn't touch another body or kiss another mouth that wasn't Nanoha's. Even if it meant returning to the abstinence again.

"I ruined it Arf… I ruined it again." she said shaking her head.

"That's true, but it wasn't only you."

"I know that, but I shouldn't have done it, I shouldn't have let myself get carried away by these feelings… not… knowing how everything would end."

"But it's too late for regrets now. You just have to let it go."

"As if it were that easy."

"It's not, but do you want to go through the same torment you went through last time?"

Fate just closed her eyes to try to block the memories.

"Fate, don't make you life more complicated. I adore Nanoha, but she'll only make you suffer if you don't end this now."

Arf got close to give her a kiss on the forehead and then went to her room. She was right, she had to leave everything behind. She just couldn't let Nanoha think the worst of her.

The weekend passed slowly. The thoughts about what had happened, made them feel like they were suspended in a limbo and not knowing what was coming. Fate looked for the way, the right words to express what that night had meant but with the firm conviction of leaving everything there. And Nanoha, tried to look for a way to not think, to not want, to not miss Fate. The thousand and one ways to not feel the jealousy that was killing her inside.

What right did she have to be jealous? What did she expect of Fate? What did she expect of herself after what happened? All of them, questions with no answers.

The day to go back to work arrived, and with it the out of control nerves. The uncertainty of not knowing what to say or how to act. The terror of seeing or feeling indifference from the other. The terror of being carried away by the impulse towards madness.

The reunion was inevitable, just that neither of them thought it would be from the elevator. A simple "Hello" and the way they avoided to look at each other, was all they needed to know they couldn't let things go just like that.

The tension in the office was worse, even when they put music like always, although this time it was to fill the silence, and Fate went for the morning coffee three times, nothing seemed to lighten the atmosphere. The concentration in their work didn't exist, the errors were constant and the progress was zero. Each one carrying their karma inside until they could no longer stand it.

"Nanoha! Fate!" they said in unison.

They couldn't help smiling at that. But immediately the silence became present, silence which Fate broke after approaching Nanoha's desk and looking at her in the eyes for the first time in the day.

"I think we need to talk about what happened."

Nanoha could only nod her head before taking a deep breath trying to calm her nerves.

Fate closed the office door and put her chair in front of Nanoha. She tried to speak several times, but nothing came out of her mouth. He throat was dry and with a lump so big that she could have drunk a whole pitcher of water. With great effort she cleared her throat and began to speak.

"This is harder than I thought." she said running her hand across her forehead. "I had it all planned out but now… I'm blank."

"Fate I…" she tried to speak.

'No, wait" she interrupted her. "Listen to me first." she took a breath. "I want you to know I'm not expecting anything from what happened. I'm not making myself believe things that are not and I much less hoping that what happened changes things between us… I know what happened… I know it was something unexpected and perhaps you feel like it is a hurricane in your life for not knowing what to do or how to explain it, but… believe me when I say that explanations are not always logical or meaningful, so it's best to just let it go and not think about it more than it is necessary."

"Is that what you want?" she asked after a few seconds in silence.

"It's not about what I want, but about what is more convenient."

"And pretend like nothing happened is the best thing?" she asked doubtful and incredulous at the same time.

"It's not that it's the best thing but…"

"I can't Fate" she interrupted her. "I can't let it go just like that. Maybe for you it's not important or relevant but for me…"

"Do you think that for me is not important?" she hastened to say. "Sure it is Nanoha, a lot. But I know how it will all end, I know how _I'll _end in all this." she said helplessly.

"What do you mean?"

"That it doesn't matter if for me it was a night like no other, if it was something that I'll never be able to forget or if it was the best night of my life, because no matter what, it's something that will never happen again… this is not your life Nanoha, and although you are now feeling a lot of confusion and have a thousand of questions with you, it will not be long before you realize that your place is and will remain with Yuuno, and that what happened with me is nothing more than just a different night, a night filled with new experiences and sensations, but in no way changes who you are or what you want, so… I just want to avoid unnecessary confusions, nothing more."

Nanoha had no answer to that. She wished to tell her so many things but deep down she knew she was right. She didn't know what to do with what she felt, with the thousand of emotions that Fate had caused on her. How to tell her that when being with Yuuno she had thought of her every day? That during the whole trip she had several times found herself wanting to share all of that with Fate. How to tell her that the best night lived with Yuuno had been the same night in which she imagined being with Fate? How to tell her and face… that what they lived far exceeded her imagination, and that now she didn't want another mouth, other hands or other body next to her that wasn't hers? How to face Yuuno now? How to continue with her life the way it had been before when she felt everything was upside down?

While Nanoha was trying to collect her thought, Fate's phone rang. When listening to her talk she immediately knew it was Carim, so she couldn't prevent the jealousy that invaded her and she remembered that the day after spending the night with her, Fate had run to Carim's arms. At that moment everything made sense to her. It wasn't that Fate wanted to avoid unnecessary confusion, it was more that she wanted to get rid of her to continue her relationship with Carim without hassles or problems. She felt anger and disappointment, but said nothing, after all who was she to demand something from her.

When Fate hung up and turned her gaze back to Nanoha she immediately noticed the change, her eyes were dark and cold, her face was almost expressionless. Although she apologized for the interruption, all she got was a "Don't worry, I understand there are priorities", and then she immediately got up with the excuse of going to the bathroom and left her there, alone.

When remembering that she had made her believe that she had been with Carim the weekend, she knew that for sure she was misinterpreting things. Her first impulse was to follow her and explain that it hadn't been that way, that she couldn't be with anyone when the memories of her body, her kisses, were so vivid in her mind; but it stopped her the fact that nothing would change the sad reality, she was married and no matter how much she told her, how much she assured her that she loved her dearly… Never, never would she leave her safety, her home, her husband, to be with her and give a 180° turn to her life. The experience told her that this was the common denominator in those cases, so she decided it was better that way. No matter how much it hurt to see that look on Nanoha, knowing that she thought the worse of her.

She had arranged to meet with Carim after work to go home and talk. Upon arrival, Fate was disturbed by what had happened, so she went straight to get a bottle of red wine while Carim sat down on the couch. She poured two glasses and sat down beside her. In almost a single gulp, Fate drank her cup. Carim only watched without touching hers.

"Is it okay?" Fate asked referring to the wine.

"Yes…" she took a small sip.

Fate finished drinking her wine and poured some more. She intended to speak, but her anxiety wouldn't let her, her throat felt dry and her mind was blank.

"I won't ask if you okay because it's obvious you're not… the question is, what has you like this?... or who?" Fate couldn't help blushing a little.

"I'm sorry" she said embarrassed.

"You don't have to…" she calmly said. "What's between us is with no demands, no reproach, so…" she didn't finish the sentence, she just shrugged her shoulders as sign of acceptance.

"That's true but… even so, I don't feel it's right… not with you."

Carim looked at her eyes for a few seconds before tightening her lips and looking down to her drink.

"Every day, I regret not being able to offer you a more serious relationship, something beyond just sex and of the moment… you're… a wonderful human being." she concluded looking back at her.

Fate couldn't hide her surprise at those words. The least she expected was something like that.

"Nanoha is very lucky…"she completed and then smiled ruefully before drinking from her cup.

"Is it that obvious?" she asked after accepting that it was best to be honest.

"No… as of Friday… jumping to the dance floor as you did and taking her to the bathroom all pissed as you were, confirmed any suspicions I might have had."

Fate took a breath, she was so absorbed in what was happening to Nanoha, that she hadn't stopped to think about the little show she had made at the bar.

"I couldn't control it." she said almost in a whisper.

"And neither could she." she added.

"What do you mean?" she asked squinting.

"That she also couldn't control her jealousy when seeing you with me."

"I don't understand." she was confused.

"Why do you think she agreed to dance with that girl? It was because she couldn't bear to see how I hugged you or kissed you…" seeing the incredulous look from Fate she continued talking. "From the moment we arrived at the bar, the only thing she did was to look at us. Watching us… or rather… you. How you touched me, hugged me… and in every one of those moments she sped her drinking. That's why she got drunk like that. In the end, she accepted to dance just to escape from what she was seeing… I must admit that when I realized everything, I felt jealous, possessive, so I sought to increase the friction between us as a reminder to her that you were with me… just that everything went backwards. I didn't count with the fact that you were… in love…"

When hearing the words in love, Fate's heart skipped a beat. But yes, she was in love, madly in love and couldn't deny it, it was just that hearing it from another mouth left her blank.

There was a deep silence for a few minutes. Both were immersed in thought. Fate assimilating what Carim told her and accepting that it was more than just attraction, but still, there was no chance to try something more formal.

"Can I ask you something?" Fate just nodded. "Did something happen between you two?"

Fate looked at her for a few seconds before answering with a laconic "Yes". Carim bit her lower lip in an attempt to control the lump that formed in her throat. She couldn't appear affected, she had no right after it was her who set the ruled of the game from the start, only sex… only sex…

"Well… that changes everything…" she finished her drink, she needed to get over the news. "And… what will you do now? How are you going to handle it?"

"There's nothing to handle… there will never be a "her and I". What happened… should have never happen, so the only thing left is to leave it behind and move on."

"And, you think you can?"

"I have to… she has her life and I have no place in it."

"Are you sure?" she said after beating the urge to reaffirm the idea of leaving everything behind. "I don't think so Fate."

"It doesn't matter… I don't want to delve into it… I couldn't go through this again."

"I understand…" she couldn't say more due to the imminent tears that accumulated in Fate's eyes.

"I'd rather deal with the pain of an impossible love than to deal with a shared love in which I'll always be at loss."

Thus the conversation ended. It didn't take more. Carim hugged her tightly before leaving, a hug that meant support and farewell at the same time, since like Fate, she preferred an impossible love to a shared love, so all she had left was to leave before falling into a bottomless abyss.

To Be Continued…

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**A/N: **what do you guys think, was it good? there's a lot of drama right? well there's gonna be much more next chapter and also a new unexpected character will appear, can you guys guess?. Also there's only two chapters left so the story will be over soon, but many things are still about to happen get upset okay? So see you all next time, and please review:)


	6. Again, It's Her And I

I know there's not much I can say right now other than I'm really really sorry for not updating in like a month, I really have no excuse, well actually I've been a little busy with school, since I'm actually a high school senior and I'm about to graduate in two days, I'm so excited, but anyway going back to the story, here's chapter 6, I hope it's good enough to pay for my absence. Please enjoy.

* * *

"Again, It's Her and I"

The days passed and the treatment between Fate and Nanoha became increasingly cold. At work everything was normal, but personally, Nanoha was evasive, elusive, always looking for excuses to avoid having to be with Fate more than necessary.

She couldn't stand being with her, every time she did, she remembered the image of Fate and Carim at the bar and that was enough to renew the jealousy and anger of having been just a slip of one night. This idea tortured her every day, but every time she felt the urge to demand an explanation, to reproach her attitude, a shower of cold water fell on her when recalling Fate's words "your place is and will remain with Yuuno".

Those words echoed in her head every single time. Words to which she tried to find any sense and truth, but deep down, she wasn't so sure they were true. Actually, she was no longer sure of anything.

For Fate, the story was very different. The uneasiness she felt every time Nanoha made excuses for not spending more time with her, was enormous. Especially knowing that making her believe she was still with Carim was the main reason for this attitude.

On more than one occasion she wanted to tell her it wasn't true, that she couldn't be with anyone else after being with her, but she knew it would only add more confusion to the whole situation, since she inevitably would have to admit her feelings and that was not an option.

At the end of the week Hayate invited them to the Sunday of poker at her house. Only Arf knew exactly what had happened, the others only thought that Fate and Nanoha had a fight over the event at the bar, hence she didn't hesitate in calling Nanoha to let her know. Nanoha tried to avoid the invitation, but Hayate was quite emphatic in saying that if she didn't go, they would go look for her at her house, so by not having a compelling reason (Yuuno's presence at home) she couldn't decline the invitation.

Fate, seeing the discomfort of Nanoha, tried to make her feel better by telling her that she might not go, however, a simple "I can imagine" made her realize she had misinterpreted her words and surely she thought her absence would be due to being with Carim. She wanted to clarify, but Nanoha gave her no time as she left before she could even try.

* * *

"How are you?" Arf asked her when seeing her lying in her bed, deep in thought.

"Fine" she reluctantly answered.

"You don't seem like so"

Fate just shrugged.

"Are you going to Hayate's?"

"I don't know… if I go, I would have to deal with Nanoha's indifference… but if I don't, it would confirm a lie…" she paused to look at her. "Either way I lose…" she looked forward again.

"Then let's go" she said approaching her and taking her by the arm.

"What are you doing?" she asked not being able to avoid getting up.

"If you lose either way, then you'll do it with us."

Fate tried to resist, but Arf gave her no truce by forcing her to dress and go with her.

They arrived at Hayate's house and Signum was already there, however, Nanoha gave no sign of showing up. Hayate had been calling her to confirm she was coming and that she would bring her famous brownies, but she didn't answer her house phone or her cell phone. Fate didn't know whether to feel relieved or disappointed. It was like a strong and painful hit to confirm that her lack of consciousness and control, had cost her to lose the friendship that united them, because nothing would ever be the same.

An hour after arriving, the doorbell rang. They thought it was the pizza they had ordered, so Fate hastened to open the door to escape even for a few minutes from the inquisitive looks from Signum and Hayate. They suspected something was happening, but so far thanks to the timely interventions of Arf they hadn't asked anything about it.

When she opened the door, she stopped when seeing it was Nanoha. They were both shocked at first, but reacted within seconds.

"Hi, it's good you're finally here." she smiled and stepped aside to let her in.

"It took me a little while to finish the brownies." she smiled back and went inside.

Once inside, they doubted to greet each other with the usual kiss, but Fate took the initiative and quickly kissed her.

"Is the pizza here?" shouted Arf before getting to where they were and seeing who it was. "But if it's my brownies" she joked approaching with open arms. "I thought you weren't coming Nanoha."

"And leave you without your sweets? I couldn't Nyahahaha" she returned the hug.

"You're the best, I've always said it. Girls look who arrived!" without giving her time for anything, Arf put her arm over her shoulders and brought her to the kitchen where the girls were.

Once there, they gave her a beer and sat down to talk while the pizza arrived. After they finished eating, they started the game and everything was normal for the first time since the incident. Fate and Nanoha interacted as usual. They talked, laughed, joked and even took part on making a prank on Signum, who, being aware of it, gave them as punishment going out to buy more ice and beer.

They left without saying a word. They arrived at the liquor store, got the things and went back. Along the way, everything was calm, there were no awkward moments. They reached the building, parked and when they were about to get off, Nanoha spoke.

"Fate… can we talk?"

"Sure" she answered after looking into her eyes for a few seconds.

"I just wanted… wanted to tell you…" she took a deep breath before speaking. "… that I miss you."

Fate let out the air she was holding due to the expectation of what she would say. She never expected that, so when hearing it, she couldn't help but feel a tingle of joy inside her and her eyes softened.

"I miss you too."

They both looked deeply at each other for seconds that seemed like hours.

"I also wanted to apologize for my attitude these days… I… had failed to understand your words and I just assumed that for you everything that happened had no value or importance… That hurt me, I never expected something like that form you, so I couldn't see beyond it."

"Nanoha…" she tried to speak.

"I know it's not like that… I know you were just trying to avoid what happened to affect me in my relationship with Yuuno and you with Carim… and that's fine, I mean… you were right to think like that, it's just that I didn't see it, not at that moment. On the other hand, being here today made me see that you also wanted to keep our friendship from changing… to be able to stay the same as before… and I want that too!, really, it's just… it's just that I can't help looking at you, being around you and think of… your kisses, your touch." she looked down trying to hide her blushing face. "You were right in saying that this is like a hurricane to me… a hurricane that I can't calm down, that I can't overcome."

Fate was speechless. She wanted to laugh, jump of joy, but she knew that everything would last only until Yuuno was back, then it would come the regrets and guilt again.

"For you it's nothing different, I know, but for me… is something I never imagined… I never thought possible of happening… something I never thought could… make me feel everything you made me feel… what do I do with all this, Fate? How can I let it go like you do? Tell me please!" as she was talking a curtain of water clouded her eyes, eventually it became small tears that swept her cheeks.

"I can't" she said looking down for a few seconds. "Because I also don't know how to let it go." she talked turning her gaze back to Nanoha.

They stared at each other for a moment before they got closer to tightly embrace each other, trying to covey in that embrace everything they felt and didn't dare to say. Reluctantly, Fate was the first to separate after minutes that seemed like heaven, but in which if she stayed like that, she wouldn't be able to control the great urge she had to kiss her until her lips were wear out.

Nanoha on the other hand, couldn't let go, she could only open the embrace to stay face to face.

"I'm terrified Fate." she whispered. "I'm afraid of what I'm feeling… I'm afraid because I don't know what to do with it."

There was a pause before Fate answered.

"Nanoha" she used all her maturity to say what had to and not what she really wanted to. "Don't think about it anymore" she felt how Nanoha winced when hearing her. Fate slowly backed away. "What you're feeling is the result of being a new experience, of the surprise of living something like that and… to have enjoyed it" Nanoha, when hearing the last part couldn't help blushing a little. "Believe me… it's just that." Fate spoke with sadness since she knew from previous experience that the attraction Nanoha felt towards her, would end the moment Yuuno appeared, or if not, when she realized that maintaining a relationship like that was a great risk to her marriage and lifestyle.

"How are you so sure?" she asked, not understanding why she rejected her emotions.

Fate's silence made her see after a few minutes, that she had to have been through the same thing before to know it with so much certainty.

"You've been through it before…" she said it more to herself than for it to be heard by Fate.

Fate just looked down. With that she confirmed her words.

"What happened?" she wanted to know to try to understand Fate's attitude. After a few seconds Fate turned her gaze forward and said.

"The first time…" _the first time?_ Nanoha thought. "I feel in love and I thought she love me the same way… but that wasn't the case… after six months of being with her, she told me she wasn't a lesbian, that although she would love to be with me, she loved her husband and wanted to have a family… that in her plans she didn't have a woman as a lover… In short, although she had enjoyed it like crazy, I would never give her what she got from her husband." Fate smiled ironically at the memory. "The second time… I didn't expect anything. I just let myself go to see what happened… the detail was that I fell in love and when I realized it, it was too late, I couldn't see my life without her… she had to leave the city and she begged me to go with her, she would give me work at her company and she would ask for the divorce so we could go live together… I was so naïve… I left everything for her… we used to write each other mails a little racy… generally describing our sexual fantasies… it was our way of keeping alive the desire, the longing to see each other and to not be overwhelmed by having to hide all the time… a bad day her secretary, read one of my mails and she surprised her while doing so… at first she tried not to care, but the rumors were becoming more noticeable until it reached the ears of the higher ups. They choose to say that I had been sexually harassing her for some time but to avoid problems and scandals she hadn't said anything… they filed a lawsuit against me, together with my mother who worked in the same company, and she seconded them, my mother was the first one to accuse me as a sexual maniac and she even used two more of my mails to support that complaint… I couldn't believe my own mother did such a thing… they offered to drop the case and give a recommendation letter if I went away…" a pair of tears, which then became more, rolled down her cheeks. "Throughout the whole process, the humiliating and degrading comments were on the daily menu at the office… I wanted to defend myself, but it was useless, my mother even threatened to destroy me professionally if they knew of my sexuality. It dealt with a lot of money so I was on the losing side no matter what… humiliated, hurt, left behind and disappointed, I came back and started to work where we are right now." at that moment she turned her head. "Now you understand why I can't afford to think about what happened between us… I can't go through this again Nanoha, I wouldn't stand it again."

As Nanoha heard the story, she felt how her heart shrank at the mere thought of what Fate had to go through, of how she was hurt in such a way, of the pain she might have felt. Seeing her cry in that silent way, was breaking her heart, it was as if she no longer had strength to keep on going. She couldn't help crying too, she hated herself for not being able to hug her and tell her she was there for her, that she would always be by her side and that she would always love her with no limits, but it wasn't like that… she didn't even know how to name those feelings she had for her.

"I'm sorry" she managed to say in a fait voice before turning to hug her and cry with her for a few minutes.

When they both were calmed, they separated again and Nanoha broke the silence.

"I don't know what it is that I feel for you, or what to do with it, but I assure you that the last thing I want is to hurt you…"

"I know" she answered truthfully.

"I just want you to know that making love with you turned my life upside down… it changed my world and now I don't even know where I stand… but despite that, I'll still be here for you as a friend, as a coworker…" she took a deep breath. "I'm sorry I cast you aside these days… I was blinded by my jealousy towards Carim for thinking that it was because of her that you didn't want to talk about the subject… sorry."

Fate nodded. The lump in her throat wouldn't let her speak.

"Well, we better go up. they must be desperate." Nanoha tried to put an end to the conversation. The pain she felt was like a dagger in her chest, but there was nothing else to say.

They left the car and headed to Hayate's apartment but before entering, with the key they had given them, Fate said:

"I haven't being with Carim." seeing the surprise in Nanoha's face, she explained. "After being with you, I couldn't do it… I felt it wasn't right, nor for you or for her."

Nanoha felt relieved but at the same time the twinge in her chest was stronger, since she realized how unfair she had been with Fate. Before she could say anything, Signum opened the door of the apartment.

"Finally, you're here, Testarrossa and Nanoha! We thought you had ran away with the loot."

They both smiled, but only on the outside since in the inside they were made a mess.

* * *

Days, week and even months passed in which they did everything possible and impossible to pretend that everything was normal, that there was no reason for things to change between them, but no matter what, everything had changed.

Neither could see the other as a friend anymore, the electric shock they felt with every touch, the anguish felt when not being together or not hearing anything of each other, the need to spend time together was much stronger than their will or strength to put distance between them, so hopelessly, they tried to stay that way.

Fate, trying to live with that impossible love, with that love growing and increasingly hurting by knowing it was unreachable, unattainable; and Nanoha trying to live with her heart divided, because she loved Yuuno, she had no doubts about that. When he came home, she tried to find anything, any sign of unwillingness or inability to continue their marriage, but it was as if Yuuno knew what she was doing, because every time he would surprise her with some gift, with a special date or with a night of passion that left her breathless.

On the other hand, the mere presence of Fate made her feel complete. She wanted her with all her heart and was convinced that she loved her, she just didn't know how else to deal with it. She wasn't capable of living without them. But how long could she last that way? Fate deserved to fall in love and start a new life with someone who loved only her, who would give everything only for her and to her and above all, someone who will make her forget all the horror she had lived… and that, wasn't her. It hurt to think that way, it hurt to accept it, but what hurt the most was to think she could cause even a fraction of that pain experienced, so in order for Fate to be happy, she had to forget about her love for her, she would do it, definitely.

* * *

During the last month, there had been rumors of the possibility that the company would merge with a larger company. Nakajima was not convinced with the idea, he thought that such merges only served for taking away the essence and mystique of the small companies, but his other partners didn't disliked the idea, so everything depended on the visit they would have from a representative from the other company, that week. They would stay there for a week seeing the work that was done, and then present their offer.

Nakajima was very angry with all that was happening, however, he was aware that there was no way to evade the visit, so minutes before the arrival of the representatives from the "Famous" company, he gathered everyone in the conference room. From one of the ends of the table he began his speech.

"Well everyone, you know that from today on we will have a visit. Everyone knows that I disagree with this whole event, but still I can't do anything about it. It makes me angry that they think that for being a small company we need them to continue or make a name out of ourselves, so I'm going to ask all of you something I know you do very well and that is to make you're selves shine. I want this people to see us as competition and to realize that we don't need them… ARE YOU WITH ME?"

Everyone answered positively and with conviction.

"Mr. Nakajima" he was interrupted by his secretary on the phone speaker. "the person you're waiting for just arrived."

"Let them come in, please."

"Immediately, sir"

It took only a few seconds of anticipation before the door opened and Emili entered, Nakajima's secretary, followed by a beautiful woman. Dark purple hair, white skin, violet eyes, approximately 5'6" with heels, a body of a goddess and the aura of a diva, made everyone in the room speechless. Even Nakajima couldn't avoid the impact of that presence.

Nanoha, instead of admiring her beauty, what she did was pray that woman wasn't gay, because if she was, she wouldn't know how to compete with her. She knew she shouldn't think like that, but the jealousy immediately invaded her. Fate had ignored several women who had flirted with her at the bar, at the gym, and other places, but this woman was impossible to ignore, so all she had left was to pray that nothing happened.

Nakajima introduced himself and each one of the team members. The gorgeous woman took the task of approaching everyone to shake hands, when she finally got to Nanoha, she was able to see a strange and particular shine in the eyes of the woman who had introduced herself as Mrs. Precia T. This particular shine inspired doubts and distrust on her, but immediately, her doubts were clear, since when extending her had towards Fate, she only showed a faint smile.

"It's a pleasure to see you again." she said quietly so the rest didn't listen.

"I can't say the same, Precia." Fate answered drily and with cold eyes.

At that moment, Nanoha's heart skipped a few beats. Although she had clearly head Fate's response, for her it was evident Precia's interest in Fate.

After she finished greeting everyone, Precia sat next to Nakajima to talk.

"Well… now that we know each other I want you to know what my goal here is… Our work mainly focuses on providing services to large companies and industries, however, we also want to cover customers in a lower level and who may not have the budget to hire a company like ours, hence we want to merge with smaller companies that can serve as a bridge in this important market and in turn, provide them with capital for their projects. This, with a level of reasonable profit sharing, which would not affect the cost of projects offered to regular customers.

My visit is to evaluate the work you do, but not because we think you're not up to par, but quite the opposite. We are confident that you share our same vision, same goals, but we don't want to make mistakes, we want to make sure we can work together and share ideas and experiences. That is my goal, to make sure that the possible merge is a success for both parties and not a mistake."

Precia smiled and waited a few moments to see if there were any questions. Given the intense silence she intervened again.

"Don't worry guys, I assure you we'll have fun."

Shy laughter was heard.

"Then say no more… you are free to start in any department you want." talked a gaping Nakajima.

After a couple of bad jokes and a sample of what would be the deployment of tactics of seduction by Nakajima, finally he let them return to their work.

Fate was the first one out, so that for a moment Nanoha lost sight of her. She managed to see that she was going to the bathroom; she had the urge to follow her, but decided it was best to wait for her in the office. After about 10 minutes Fate still wasn't back, so Nanoha thought it was best to go check that everything was fine.

The bathroom was separated into three cubicles, but unlike the common bathrooms, there were fully closed, they only had grids at the bottom of each door.

"Fate?" she called upon entering. There was no answer. She began to knock on every door, but only one was closed. "Fate? Are you okay?" silence "Fate please, you're scaring me" more silence "Fate open the door!" she was really worried now. "Or I'll have to call maintenance to open!" she threatened.

It wasn't long before she heard the door been unlocked. Nanoha carefully opened the door not knowing what to expect. When it was completely opened, she found a Fate sitting on the floor with her knees bent, hugging herself and looking lost.

"Oh my God!" was all she managed to say. With no questions or inquiries she sat beside her and hugged her. She felt how Fate was uncontrollably shaking.

At that moment the only explanation that came to her mind was that Precia was the cause of her last bad experience. Fate had never given more details about that person, but her reaction was more than enough to reach this conclusion.

The shaking persisted and although Nanoha rubbed her arms to warm her up, she knew that the shaking wasn't due to being cold.

"Come on Fate, we must return to the office. We only have one hour left of work." she spoke softly.

With great effort, she managed to bring her to her feet. She took her to the sink and poured some water on her face.

"Don't let her see that her presence affects you"

At these words Fate looked at her, until that moment she had seemed lost in thought.

"It's her, right?... she is the reason you came back"

Fate just nodded. The lump in her throat was so great that she couldn't pronounce a word.

"There's only one hour left. We'll return to the office, pretend to be busy and then leave. Can you do that?... I know you can." she whispered to her ear when hugging her.

And so they did. Precia was still on Nakajima's office so it was easy to pass by. The hour passed slowly, but once over, Nanoha delicately took Fate by the arm and pulled her out of there as fast as she could.

Once reaching the house, Nanoha laid her on the bed and let her rest. She would check on her every so often to see if she wanted something, but Fate didn't react, she continued staring at the wall and without uttering a word. In one of those times she entered the room she saw her shivering, immediately she went to her side and found her burning with fever. Frightened as she was, she called Arf and asked her to return home urgently but without giving her details, meanwhile she set about putting ice packs on her in an attempt to control her body temperature.

Arf arrived an hour later. Nanoha was on the verge of tears when Aft entered the room to see what was happening.

"Nanoha what happened?" she asked dislodged at the scene before her. Fate curled like a ball between Nanoha's arms, who rocked slightly trying to comfort her.

She didn't answer. She kissed Fate on the forehead and then carefully placed her on the pillow and then got up. She took Arf by the arm and left the room.

"Nanoha, what the hell happened?" she said exasperated.

"The name Precia T. tells you something?"

"WHAT?"

"Precia T!"

"Yes, I heard you… but I don't understand why… how…" she couldn't speak.

"She was in the office today."

"WHAT?" she repeated with more awe. "But what was she doing there?"

Nanoha told her in detail what had happened.

"Of course and since that is the only company of that kind that exist here!" Arf exclaimed sarcastically. "I can't believe that bit**. Wasn't she satisfied with all the damage she has already done? Does she have to come here and destroy her even more?" Arf was out of herself with rage.

"Arf we have to take her to the doctor." she said after a pause. "She has a high fever and it's dangerous."

"It won't do" she said after relaxing a little and sitting on the couch.

"What do you mean it won't? Arf she could have a seizure!" she spoke with disbelief at the answer.

"I know Nanoha, but… I already went through this before and all we can do is wait."

"But wait for what?" she said with despair.

"For her to assimilate everything, the fever is emotional." she said "When she went through all those things with Mrs. Precia and returned here, she arrived the same as now… she wouldn't speak, wouldn't get out of bed, wouldn't eat and suddenly the fever appeared. I took her to the doctor and she was hospitalized to be observe and lower her temperature. They did tests and analysis trying to discover what provoked it but nothing appeared… so after 3 days they concluded that it wasn't caused by anything physical, it was an emotional reaction. When the fever went away, they released her but on the condition that she made an appointment with a psychologist to treat her depression, but she never went. As much as I tried to convince her, her answer always was that there was nothing to do about it, she was dead and there was nothing to treat…" for a moment she was immersed in thought, then she shook her head slightly, then concluded. "It's hard to see her like that but trust me… is better to give her some time."

"And if she doesn't get better?" she asked with fear.

"She will" she answered after refusing to think about that possibility.

Nanoha couldn't hold the tears that accumulated in her eyes. It hurt so much to just imagine what Fate had to go through.

"I hate seeing her like this… I feel so helpless." she said in a faint voice as she sat beside her on the couch and rest her arms on her legs.

"Me too…" she ran her hand up and down her back trying to comfort her, although it was rather a mutual comfort because deep down, the fear that Fate failed to overcome that situation, invaded her.

"No Arf… it's not the same" she turned to her with sadness in her eyes. "I…I…"

"What?" she prompted her to talk.

"Nothing, forget it." she had the urge to tell her everything she felt, but she quailed and looked toward the floor.

"Nanoha tell me, what's wrong?" she knew she needed to talk, but she couldn't tell her she was aware of what had happened between her and Fate.

"Arf I can't, just… forget it, okay?" she raised her hands to her face to hide it.

Arf thought for a minute before speaking.

"Do you love her?"

"What?..." she raised her had to look at her with her eyes wide open. "Of course I love her Arf, how can you ask me that!" she said in a tone of outrage to disguise the fact that the question had caught her off guard.

"Do you love her?" she repeated the question and intensively staring at her.

Nanoha wanted to escape from that gaze, but she couldn't, when Arf wanted she could be intimidating. So she just nodded with resignation. There was an uncomfortable silence in which Arf thought about the implications of that. It was true that Nanoha wasn't Precia and she was by far an exceptional woman, but it was equally true that she was a married woman, so there was no point if she loved her or not. But on the other hand, she knew that Nanoha must be drowning with what she was feeling, so she thought it was time to show her how she really was her friend, and she could trust her, even if the subject would include Fate.

"Do want to talk about it?"

Nanoha smiled reluctantly after laying her body backwards.

"What do you want me so say?" she turned to look at her. "That I'm in love with her?... that I can't go a day without knowing or being with her?... that I'm dying because I can't scream to her that I'm here and to forget about the past?... that I don't know what the hell to do with what I feel?... that's what you want me to say?"

"Is that what you want?"

Nanoha stared at her a few seconds before more tears accumulated in her eyes and she had to close them in an attempt to stop them.

"I don't know…" she said after a few minutes that seemed like an eternity. "When I'm by her side I feel all those things, there is no one else but her… but then, when Yuuno arrives… I feel so good with him that… I think it's hypocritical of me to even think I can love her… then comes the confusion because I feel that I'm also being a hypocrite with Yuuno and I don't know what to do or think, much less what to feel about it… I'm a mess Arf…" she said no longer being able to control the tears running slowly down her cheeks. "I'm going crazy not knowing what to do."

Arf just embraced her while Nanoha cried for several minutes.

At first Arf had thought Nanoha had only fallen into the trap of trying new things to escape from her husband's absences, however, seeing her that way and listening to her talk with mixed feelings made her realize that the story wasn't so simple, that the presence of those feelings made everything more complicated.

First, accepting the fact that she had feelings of love towards Fate. Second, choosing between ignoring what she felt and continue to follow her role in society, or accepting that she was different and give vent to her feeling; and third, facing the fact that if she accepted all that, she had to think about the breaking of her marriage, since it was clear that Fate wouldn't accept her in her life in any other way, not after what had happened in the past.

On the other side was Fate, who despite being deeply in love with Nanoha, refused to give importance or relevance to what she felt. It was difficult enough knowing she was in love with an impossible love to further made herself feel hope and believe in stories that only existed in her imagination. She had been there and would definitely not fall back into that abyss. With the presence of Precia, everything was more difficult, it was a vivid reminder of why she would deny something like that, no matter what she might feel. It just wasn't an option.

"Have you told any of this to Fate?"

"I wanted to… after…" she stopped and hesitated to tell her what had happened between them.

"Being together?" she completed at Nanoha's silence.

She jumped when hearing this, she always had the feeling that Fate had told her what had happened, but wasn't sure, so when hearing the confirmation she couldn't help looking forward and blushing.

"Don't worry, Fate didn't tell at will, I realized when I saw you coming out of here the next morning, so she had no choice." Nanoha took a deep breath before continuing.

"After that… I wanted to talk. Tried to understand what was happening to me… but Fate refused to do so. At first I thought it was because of Carim, but then she told me about her experiences and I realized it wasn't fair to involve her in my confusion. So I chose to shut up and… simply be without hope or expect anything more… she deserves much more than what I can give her right now…I feel like I have my feelings and interests divided, she definitely doesn't deserve something like that." she turned to look at her with sincerity covering her face. "I love her enough to know that at this moment, my love for her is worthless if I'm not capable of making a decision."

They didn't say more. At those words, it wasn't necessary to add anything more. After a few minutes in silence, Nanoha gathered her things to go home, get clothes for the next day and then come back.

She watched over Fate the whole night. Every hour she gave her some water to avoid dehydration. She alternated the cold compresses between her head, neck and chest, and took her temperature every 2 hours.

The next day, she went to the office and made up a dental emergency for Fate's absence. No one doubted, or thought it might be for other reasons. Nakajima didn't even notice, since he was with Precia all day visiting some of the most important customer of the company. He said he didn't agree with the possible merge, but he had been dazzled by the beauty of Precia so he didn't hesitate to pay homage in order to stay by her side and deploy all his worn out tactics of seduction.

She worked non-stop in order to leave an hour earlier. She bought Chinese food for dinner and went to see Fate. Arf, who had stayed with her all day, had to leave to her business because a problem came up and it had to be solved immediately, but she would come back later. Meanwhile, Fate was still sleeping, but at least without a fever.

Nanoha took a shower and lay down next to Fate. She closed her eyes for a moment to rest since the fatigue of not having slept the night before was having its effects. Without knowing at what moment, she fell fast asleep, so much that she didn't feel when Fate awoke and got up to take a shower too. The constant fever of the day before had left traces of sweat on her pajamas, so the first thing she needed was a bath.

While Fate was in the shower, Nanoha woke up and when not seeing Fate at her side, the fear invaded her. Disoriented she caught the sound of the shower and ran to the bathroom, opened the door and went straight to the bathtub.

"Fate are you okay?" she asked opening the door of the bath without permission or excuse. Her anguished face was enough to know that she hadn't even realized what she was doing.

"Yes, I just wanted to take a shower" she answered with her voice a little weak.

"God! What a shock!" she sighed with relief. "I fell asleep and didn't feel when you got up."

"I noticed" she slightly smiled. "Can I… finish bathing?"

"What?" it took her a few seconds to realize the situation and open her eyes wide in embarrassment. "Oh, Fate sorry! I didn't realize!"

She closed the door of the bath and left with an embarrassed face on. Minutes later Fate came out of the bathroom with her bathrobe, Nanoha blushed again when seeing her.

"Fate I'm sorry, I didn't mean to" she apologized as she rose from the bed where she was sitting.

"I know, don't worry." she smiled to reassure her.

"How do you feel? Are you hungry? Thirsty?..."

"I'm fine. I just want to leave the room for a while."

"Sure, sure… I'll make you tea while you dress."

"I'd prefer a coffee."

"A coffee then." she smiled broadly when seeing her much better.

When Fate came out of the room, Nanoha had a cup of coffee ready with some cookies.

"Come here, sit" she took the coffee to the couch. "Here you'll be more comfortable."

After a few minutes in which Fate tasted the coffee, she spoke.

"And Arf?"

"She had to solve some problem at work, she'll be back later."

"She stayed here all day, right?"

"Yes."

"And you stayed all night" she said. Nanoha nodded. "Thank you… you didn't have to."

"But I wanted to. I wasn't going to leave you the way you were." she said without hesitation.

Fate took another sip of coffee.

"And the office? What…?"

"Don't worry, I made up a dental emergency and they all believed it, so don't panic." Fate opened her mouth to speak, but made up her mind. "She didn't realize your absence…" she read her thoughts. "She was out all day with Nakajima."

Fate nodded with relief. The last thing she wanted was for Precia, her mother, to realize that she had affected her in such a way. Not after the effrontery with which she had spoken as if nothing had happened.

However, everything was very recent. Seeing her again reminded her of not only the bad things, but also of how much she had thought her mother would accept her preferences. In a single instant thousands of feelings and emotions invaded her, hence the shock.

The dilemma was, what to do now. She wanted to confront her and prove to her that she had managed to overcome what had happened, but she felt incapable of doing so. She wanted to hate her, despise her, but it was impossible. Seeing her again, made her realize that it was more what she had loved her as a mother than what she could hate her. Had loved her? HAD? Was that true? Was it really past?

In that moment she realized that yes, she no longer felt anything towards her mother, she was madly in love with the woman beside her, she was in love with Nanoha, and Precia had no more place in her heart. A sharp pain went through her, because one way or another, the story repeated itself. And frankly, she was tired of repeating it, so she needed to take action before things could get out of control. Inside, she knew what she had to do, but it was something she wouldn't share with anyone until the appropriate time.

"I think… it would be good for me to eat something." she changed the subject.

"There's soup and Chinese food, is that good?"

"Yes, thank you. Only the soup for now."

Nanoha immediately went to the kitchen to heat and serve everything. While eating, they discussed the project they were working on. Nanoha understood that Fate needed to focus on something that helped her forget, so she explained everything she had done that day and they discussed changes to make it better.

Then they sat on the sofa to watch TV for a while. At that time, Arf came and sat with them for dinner. The original plan was to stay for a movie night, but one of Arf's girls insisted on meeting her that night. She intended to reject the invitation, but seeing Fate's improvement and her insistence to go out, made her change her mind so she decided to go.

They both loved the movies of Jack Nicholson, so they chose to see 2 of his movies, "As Good As It Gets" and "Something's Gotta Give".

It wasn't like Fate felt great, but she decided that that night and the next she would enjoy without thinking of the later, so gradually she began to approach Nanoha until she draw her to her lap and hugged her as if they were a couple. Nanoha let herself go, it was as if nothing else existed, which was what she most deeply wanted, at least for a few hours.

They stayed like that, alternating hugs, sensitive caresses, furtive kisses on the head, the back of their hands, the neck. This last ones were more heated when the kisses were accompanied by small caresses with the tip of the nose at first instance and then with small bites. The innocent caresses became more profound and daring when seeking to obtain direct contact with the skin under the clothing.

Forgetting about the movies, they gave in to desire, the need and urgency that they had. They began to undress with no haste, discovering each other. Trying to memorize with eyes, skin and mouth every each of their bodies.

This time, Nanoha sought to cover all of Fate's body with kisses and curious fingers. Learning to touch and caress the body of a woman, learning how to make, the body with which she had dreamed of, shiver, learning how to love it and steal moans and sighs of ecstasy from its owner.

When she reached the most intimate part of Fate, ending kneeling between her legs, she ran her fingertips over it, she slightly opened the lips to see her swollen clit from the arousal and glowing skin due to the moisture caused by her touch.

Fate's opened legs welcomed her, and also allowed her to smell the aroma of a real woman, which to her surprise was like an aphrodisiac, because it kindled much more her senses, obsessively requiring her to get immersed in the sea of nectar flowing inside Fate.

She kissed, licked and sucked until she made Fate scream in pleasure with no hesitation or shame. Hearing her moan, scream and knowing that her caresses were responsible for this reaction, made her want to stay there for much longer. And she did, though Fate begged for a break to recover from the attacks of that delicious mouth, it was like Nanoha didn't hear her.

After making her come a few times in a row, she finally let her rest, but only because she needed to kiss her, hug her and feel her naked body next to hers. Still feelings Fate's spasms, Nanoha got up and sat on top of her legs. She placed her arms around her neck and fiercely kissed her with need.

The arousal she felt, made her heart beat out of control. Her breasts ached and her center burned like a fire. Fate, still in heaven as she was, didn't hesitate to put her hands around Nanoha's waist and move down to her butt to sensually start massaging them. Using circular motions, she began to move her fingers closer into the groove that separated them and with each movement, she went farther until reaching to touch it and then go from the opening of her anus to her clit.

At that moment, Nanoha held her breath for a few seconds, before releasing a deep, long moan. She was so aroused that she almost came at with the first touch. She managed to hold two more breaths before her hips had life of their own and rubbed her whole center with Fate's fingers. Fingers that nimbly spread her fluids across her privacy favoring the touch and movements they did.

Fate moved her hand to Nanoha's front to achieve a better access to her center, positioning herself so as to stimulate her clit with the palm of her hand and her index and middle fingers to penetrate her completely. Nanoha tried to enjoy the slow movements that Fate did when moving in and out of her, but when doing circular and curved movements, the first thrill of anticipation was present and in few minutes causing the imminent explosion and with it, screams of pleasure.

Nanoha thanked God for being on the couch, because her legs lost all strength and she couldn't help to collapse on top of Fate, who after a few minutes, started to slowly lay her on the couch until she was on top of her and she place her face next to her neck.

They stayed like that, hugging each other for countless minutes, feeling and hearing the heartbeat of their hearts. Just a couple of words said by Nanoha broke the silence. A couple of words that filled all space.

"I love you…"

To Be Continued…

* * *

**A/N:** So, was this good enough? there's only one more chapter and I promise I'll try to update as soon as possible, there's still some more things to happen, can you guys guess?. Well please review and again I'm sorry for the late update, I'll try to not do it again :)


	7. Forever And Ever, Nanoha and I

"Forever And Ever, Nanoha and I"

Fate opened her eyes when hearing those words. It was something she didn't expected. She doubted for a moment if it had just being her imagination or it had being real.

Slowly she sat up to look at Nanoha's eyes. She felt fear, anticipation and disbelief. She had always avoided imagining or thinking of hearing those words from Nanoha and now that she had heard them… it seemed like her imagination was just playing a cruel game with her.

Nanoha couldn't help saying them, every ounce of her body felt the love she had for her, and it made it impossible for her to hide it anymore.

"I love you" she repeated, looking at her in the eyes and without hesitation. She wanted her to see the honesty of her words in her eyes, giving complete access to her soul.

Fate felt the lump in her throat. She knew everything was insane, but hours before she had decided that even for just two days, she would let herself be driven by her feelings without thinking of what might come after. She would have plenty of time later to face the consequences.

She got closer to Nanoha until their lips were inches apart, and whispered before kissing her. "And so do I"

A kiss full of emotions and feelings. A kiss with only one purpose, to seal a moment like no other.

Already in the room, Fate was determined to love her with everything she had, with everything she felt, so she lay Nanoha facing down and she placed herself on top of her, resting her weight on her arms. She pulled Nanoha's red hair to the side, to be able to caress her neck, her earlobe and cheek with the tip of her nose. Tender touches, warm, full of love rather than lust. She wanted to make love to her, not just sex.

When reaching the end of her neck, Fate separated herself just enough to be able to caress Nanoha's back with her breasts. With slow and curved movements, she caressed every inch of her, even the line that divided her but, where she took her time until she made Nanoha move her hips with slight impatience. She continued her journey south, causing the valley of her breasts to warmly caress Nanoha's legs when making sure they stay right in between them.

When Nanoha thought she would start her way back, Fate made her turn to do so, but facing up. The anticipation from the contact, made Nanoha jump more than once when feeling the tip of the nipples on her skin, her breathing was no longer paused or calm, and her knuckles were white from clenching the sheets.

Those caresses were driving her crazy, she softness of the skin, the delicate and smooth touches and above all, knowing that when opening her eyes, it would be Fate's face what she would see, that was what made her delirious.

With Yuuno, there had never been a problem in regards to sex, they complemented each other perfectly, however, what she was feeling and living with Fate went much further, it was as if they were the two sides of one same coin.

When Fate was once again in front of her, she placed her arms around her neck and pulled her down to a kiss full of passion and need, but an irrepressible explosion invaded her when feeling Fate's sex on hers, together with the heat and the wetness from the arousal. She farther opened her legs to get more contact between each other and after frantically rubbing their swollen clits, signs of orgasms made their appearance.

They tried to look at each other's eyes as long as possible, but the spasms were so intense that they couldn't avoid closing them and enjoying the pleasure that ran through their bodies.

When feeling her arms losing the strength to hold her up, Fate tried to move and lie down next to Nanoha, but the latter held her and pulled her down to lie on top of her, placing Fate's head between her neck and chest. Nanoha didn't want to separate from her; she wanted, _needed_ to have her very close to herself, she _needed_… Fate to listen to every beat of her heart, which beat so fast just for her.

She never imagined she could feel that way with anyone other than Yuuno, it was something she didn't think possible until now, until that moment, because it wasn't only something physical, it was much more intense. The first time had been amazing, but this time, it had been overwhelming.

They were left speechless. Their bodies said it all, so they just stayed there, sharing the intimacy of the moment.

The next morning, Nanoha woke up with the gentle caresses of Fate on her back and feeling the warmth of her body. Smiling with laziness and drowsiness, she began to turn around until she was facing Fate.

"Good morning" she said with a hoarse voice.

"Morning" she smiled in response.

Nanoha hugged Fate, hiding her face in the warm neck of her companion, not being able to remove the smile from her lips. Suddenly, she gasped and quickly sat up.

"How are you feeling?" she asked with concern and touching her forehead with her fingers to check the temperature.

"I'm fine"

"Are you sure? You didn't feel any fever during the night?" she checked the temperature of her neck.

"Yes… but a different kind" she replied with a smirk on her face.

Nanoha smiled and looked down as a blush spread on her face.

"I'm fine…" she raised her face to look at her in the eyes. "Really" after a few moments looking at each other, Fate tenderly kissed her. "What I do have is hunger" she said after getting separated.

"Me too" she seconded.

"Then let's go cook something"

They got up from the bed and while Fate was looking for her clothes in her closet, Nanoha recalled that hers had been left outside in the living room.

"Fate my clothes are outside"

"Oops!" she turned to her. "Well… I actually prefer you that way" she smiled raising one of her eyebrows and looking at her from top to bottom.

"Fa-Fate!" she scolded her.

"But it's true" she insisted.

Nanoha, despite feeling exposed, looked up in a form of challenge.

"Well… I'm actually much more comfortable like this…" she fixed her hair. "If you don't mind… I think Arf won't either" she headed to the door, but Fate grabbed her by the elbow just before she opened the door.

"Wow Wow! What do you think you're doing?"

"Well to get some breakfast, isn't that what we were going to do?"

"Yes… but that outfit is just for me" she grabbed her hand and led her to the closet to give her a shirt and some shorts.

They left the room, Fate went into the kitchen and Nanoha went to retrieve her clothes, but was surprised to not find them. While searching for them, Arf came out of her room.

"I think what you're looking for is in laundry basket" she said waling past her directly to the kitchen.

"Thanks" she was a little embarrassed, but not for what had happened with Fate, but for what she could now think of her after the conversation they had.

"I imagine you're already feeling better" Arf said looking at Fate as she poured a glass of water.

"That's right" she nodded. Fate knew that Arf was against what had happened, there was no need for her to say it.

"I'm glad" she looked at them both for a few seconds before speaking again. "Well… I leave you to continue with your… things"

She turned around and went back to her room. Fate ignoring the discomfort of the situation, and turned her attention to the cabinet in search of something to eat. She would not waste even a single minute of her weekend worrying about how good or bad it all was. She knew exactly what to do, at that moment, and after.

After breakfast they decided to go for a walk. Fate wanted some fresh air, she needed to recover some strength in her body, she wanted to get rid of all the bad energy that had been left from seeing her mother Precia. Now that she was sure in her heart, that everything was past history, she needed to finish getting rid of any vestige of the initial shock.

During their walk, they had a great time. They chatted and joked as they had always done, Fate enjoyed every minute of it, she knew they were valuable minutes, since she had never imagined to get from Nanoha that cheeky look, that knowing look they shared whenever their hands touched, when for any reason, Nanoha would seek to stick to her or hold hands. On the other hand, being able to look at her as a woman without having to hide it or lie about it, made her feel an immense relief, even if it was just for two days, they were moments she would forever keep lock in her heart.

Before returning home, they went to the video store to rent some new movies. They wanted to spend the rest of the day at home, where they could be free to express their newly confessed love. They didn't take long, since the need to kiss, hug and touch each other was driving them crazy. They looked like a teenage couple, especially Nanoha, who's eyes would shine with desire every time they crossed with Fate's. She wanted to devour her with kissed, to hear her moans of pleasure, to feel those hands on her skin, she wanted Fate to take over her body and to make love to her again and again.

As they left the store with the movies and some snacks, a male voice called Nanoha. The latter turned around with curiosity to know who it was.

"Hey! Nanoha!" he approached her with a serious but cheerful pose and hugged her.

"Acous" she said with surprise, returning the hug.

"It's good to see you. I've been calling your house but no one answers. Yuuno gave me the number."

Acous was a tall man, had a good body, white skin like theirs, green long hair, intense blue eyes, and was Yuuno's friend. They had been co-workers before Yuuno quit the airline and he had always been a great friend to both of them. Of been found in other circumstances she would have been very happy to see him, but at that moment, she felt vulnerable and nervous, but she knew how to hide it, as he didn't even notice.

"I've been working late" she said with a grin.

"I'll be here all week. Yuuno already told me he changed his schedule and will be returning on Monday, so you'll probably have me in your house for dinner everyday hahaha… I really miss your cooking."

"Good thing you told me… I'll start looking for a place to move into." she joked to disguise the surprise caused on her. Not only because she wouldn't be able to be with Fate as she had imagined, but also because of the news that Yuuno was returning earlier. She thought he wouldn't be home for at least two more weeks, so she still wasn't prepared to see him, not after what had happened with Fate.

"Don't be so mean honey, don't you see how much I love you. If you weren't Yuuno's wife, I swear I would have already made you my wife hahaha" he hugged her once again and kissed her on the head.

While all of this was happening, Fate was trying not to show in her face the ripping felling she felt inside, because that meeting had made her fall from her cloud back into reality. She knew that all that happiness was only for that weekend, it was something she had already thought about and with which she was dealing, but she hadn't include having to deal with Yuuno's return. She thought that knowing he was far from Nanoha would make things easier for her.

"Acous, please!" she answered rolling her eyes.

"Yes, yes I know you're madly in love with Yuuno and there isn't even the slightest possibility of you leaving him… but trust me… if I had met you before, I would be telling a different story." he winked. "Hey but don't be so rude. I'm Acous" he stretched her had to Fate, who forced a smile and shook it. "I'm at your service" he spoke gallantly.

"Fate Testarossa" she said with indifference. The last thing she wanted at that moment was his cheap complements.

"You're cordially invited to dinner at Nanoha's…"

"Wait Acous, what are you doing?" she asked surprised by his boldness.

"She's with you right? So I assume you're good friends and if she's your friend, well… she's my friend too" he smiled.

Nanoha knew Acous was a Casanova and when seeing his intentions, jealousy invaded her, so she decided it was enough.

"Don't flatter yourself, that she's not available Acous" she quickly said.

"Well, but a dinner doesn't hurt anyone" he insisted.

"But still I can't. Anyway, thanks for inviting me." Fate tried to be friendly. Surely he would talk about that encounter with Yuuno and the last thing she wanted was to cause an uncomfortable situation for Nanoha.

"It's a pity, it really is. But you know I'm at your complete service over the next week." Fate nodded. "And you, woman of my dreams, I hope you start thinking about the delicious dishes you'll prepare for me hahahaha."

"Sure, I'll think about the different pizza places I can call."

With a big hug they said goodbye. When continuing on their way back to the apartment, the silence between them was intense. Nanoha couldn't believe her bad luck. Never, in all the time she had been with Fate and hand out with her as a friend, had they ever encounter anyone related to Yuuno. But exactly today, when the last thing she wanted was to talk or think about him, they had to meet Acous. She didn't need to ask how Fate was feeling. The darkness of her eyes and the severe seriousness of her face said it all.

Fate, on the other hand, sought only the strength to bear it all. The courage… to keep up with her decision.

Upon entering the apartment and leaving the things on the table, Nanoha grabbed Fate by the arm to make her turn around and hugged her. She buried her face in her neck and hugged her tightly.

"I'm sorry Fate… I'm sorry" she spoke almost in a whisper. What hurt her most of all was knowing that somehow, she was doing exactly what she had tried to avoid… hurting her, and that was breaking her heart.

Fate hugged her back without a word, at least for a moment.

"You don't have to apologize… that's your life… that's where you belong." she said with muffled voice, but without hesitation.

"That's true, but… I… don't…" she tried to speak, but what could she said that didn't sound hollow and hypocritical.

"That is your life Nanoha… not this one" she said after separating a bit to look at her eyes.

Tears were already present in Nanoha's eyes, and the only thing she managed to say was "I love you"

"So do I…" she caressed her cheek wiping a tear coming down. "But that's not enough… sometimes love… is not enough."

"What… do you mean?" she asked with fear, because for the first time, she felt her distant. It was true she didn't know what would happen from then on, but she knew she wanted Fate in her life. She needed her.

"That you will never leave your life… and I will never be able to share you. Not you."

"Fate…" the lump in her throat was huge. She wanted to talk, but didn't know what to say. Placing her index finger on Nanoha's lips, Fate stopped her from continuing.

"You know it and so do I… but today and tomorrow… you're mine and I'm yours, I want it to be just you and me." having nothing more to say, she kissed her. She kissed her with everything she had, with everything she felt, trying to put into that kiss her whole being.

Between kissed and tears, they loved each other intensely. There was no room to think about tomorrow. Only in the today and now. The pain was so vivid that they made love until all energy was drain from their bodies. They gave in into each other without reservation, without shame, without fear or hesitation. They became one single being.

The next morning, they were awakened by the ringing of Nanoha's cell phone. It was Yuuno. Reluctantly, she answered.

"Hello"

"_Nanoha, where are you?" _he asked concerned, but a bit angry.

"Hi… I'm at Fate's house… we were working and it got late so stayed here." she lied.

"_Mmmm… well, I'm home"_ he said after a few seconds.

"I didn't know you returned today" she said surprised and sitting upright in the bed.

"_You would've know of having been here"_ he reproached.

"True" she said after a sigh. "I'm sorry. I'll be on my way in a minute"

"_I'll be waiting"_

She knew Yuuno was probably thinking of the worst, and he was right, just that it wasn't exactly as he imagined, at least not everything. When hanging up, she put her hands in her head. She felt overwhelmed by everything she'd have to face. Getting out of there and not knowing what would happen tomorrow. Getting home and pretending everything was the same, looking inside and trying to put order to the storm that was raging inside her.

She felt Fate's hand encircle her waist and hug her. She gently pulled her until she was resting on her body, then she hugged her with both hands and kissed her on the temple. Since the day before, she hadn't been able to control her tears, despite having the most intense night of her life and where she gave herself in, body and soul, the pain she felt was constant. She felt like everything they had lived was a goodbye, and that thought, tore her heart apart. She didn't know what to do. For the first time in ages, she didn't know which road to take.

For Fate, the story was different, though she knew she would never again hold her that way and that it was the end of a story that had just began, her heart was at peace, because this time, she knew, she was sure that it hadn't been just a game for Nanoha, an experiment, a whim of the moment and that, although it didn't change the ending, at least didn't leave her with the bitter taste of deceit and betrayal.

She would have for the rest of her life the beautiful memories of that unforgettable night. She would be able to close her eyes and remember every gesture, every line, every place of Nanoha's body, its taste, its smell, the sound of her voice and her expressions of pleasure… she would remember each and every single one of the times she was hers and hers alone.

Without exchanging many words, Nanoha got up, dressed, and when she was about to leave the room she stopped and turned to hug with all her strength a Fate who watched her from a corner of the room.

"I love you Fate… I want you to know that…" she raised her face to look at her. She tried to say more, but no words came out.

Fate caressed her cheek with the back of her fingers and then kissed her lips tenderly. She had to contain the overriding desire to keep her there with her, but with the little strength she had left, she let her go. After that, she just sat in the bed staring into nowhere and with a blank mind. She didn't want to think or feel, if she did, she wouldn't be able to resist running out and look for her.

It took hours or minutes, she didn't know, before Arf came in and sat beside her.

"Are you okay?"

"I will" she said almost in a whisper.

"Is it worth going through this again Fate?"

"Every minute… every second… it was worth every moment." she said without hesitation and looking at Arf with tears crossing her cheeks. "I prefer having had the opportunity to love her if only for a couple of days than to be the rest of my life without having done it."

Arf nodded after a moment and without saying more, she hugged her.

"But now I need your help" Fate added while they were separating.

"Anything you want"

The next morning, Nanoha left early for the office, despite having had a tense day with Yuuno, who didn't hesitate for a second on confronting her and put pressure on her to see if she was lying to him, her mind was not there, so she just answered what Yuuno wanted to hear without stopping to think of how she felt about him. At night, she only dedicated herself to fulfill her role as faithful wife and lover, but the truth was that she was absent. Although her body was been loved wildly and with need by Yuuno, her mind was always with Fate, her refuge, her peace.

As she meditated sitting in her office waiting for everyone to arrive, she realized that her marriage was already a farce. Until then, she had felt that her heart was divided, but the reality was that her heart and love had only one owner and it wasn't Yuuno. She couldn't lie to herself, it wasn't fair for either of the three. Out of respect for the love she once felt for Yuuno, and out of respect for the love she felt for Fate, it was necessary to accept that their relationship had ended. She didn't want another mouth, other touch, or other kisses that weren't those of Fate, so there was no other possible solution.

To her surprise, taking that decision made her feel relief. She dreaded the thought of having to accept her new "sexual orientation" but if all those months spent with Fate, Arf, Signum and Hayate, had thought her something, it was that although it was difficult to live that way, it was more important to accept herself and be faithful to her feelings.

Staff members began to arrive except for Fate. Nanoha gave her some time, thinking that maybe she would have over slept, but when it got to 9 and there was no sign of her, she began calling her home and cell phone, but got no answer. The home phone could probably burst ringing and still no one answered, and the cell phone sent her to the voice mail on the first ring. Fearing that Fate had had a relapse, she called Arf.

"Arf?" she spoke eagerly when hearing her answer.

"Yes, hi"

"Hi Arf, sorry to bother you, but Fate hasn't arrive at the office and I have been calling her to the house and cell phone, but she doesn't answer. Is everything okay? Did something happen?" she asked with concern. Arf stayed silent for a moment. "Arf?"

"She's fine… she's just…"

"What?" her heart was beating out of her chest.

"She left, Nanoha. She left the city."

"WHAT?" she immediately turned pale.

"Yes, Nanoha, I'm sorry"

"Bu-bu… but I don't understand. Why? What for?"

In that moment a call came from inside the extension of Nakajima's office.

"Arf, wait a moment please, don't hang up… Yes, Emili" she answered the secretary.

"Nanoha, Nakajima wants you in his office now"

"Okay Emili, I'll be there in 5 minutes"

"Nanoha, I recommend you to go now. Nakajima is in a bad mood today"

After sighing, she answered. "Ok, I'm on my way" she hung up and return to the conversation with Arf. "Arf I have to go, the director needs me. Please tell when she'll return. I don't know what to tell Nakajima is he asks about her."

"I think she already spoke with him"

Nanoha closed her eyes in an attempt to control the urge she had to scream and cry. She couldn't believe or even imagine that Fate was gone and without a word.

"Is she coming back?" she asked in a whisper.

"I don't know" for Arf it was hard being in the middle, she really cared about them both, they were like sisters to her. "Nanoha… I'll go to your office at noon"

Nanoha didn't answer, she just hang up the call. It was as if they had turned her world around. As for mere body memory she headed for Nakajima's office to finish confirming what she already knew, that she wouldn't return.

"Good morning" she greeted him upon entering his office.

"The good I still haven't seen, but… come in and sit down" he replied a little tense. "Fate called yesterday. She has a very serious family problem that requires her departure from the city, indefinitely, so she quit. She assured me that later this week she'll send me her completed part of the project so in that matter, we're fairly well. But, as you know her departure at this time, when we are on the verge of merging with another company, is nothing positive so we'll have to temporarily cover her absence. I may not agree with the merge, but I don't want the absence of one of my employees to be the reason for it not to happen, so if anyone asks, especially _her_, tell them she was sent on a business trip and will come back in two weeks, okay?"

"Yes"

"Well… that's it" he said turning his attention back to the computer.

Nanoha returned to her office and sat down looking out the window. She couldn't believe what was happening.

At noon, Arf arrived exactly when everyone was going out to eat. As expected, Nanoha hadn't even order food from the cafeteria, she just counted the minutes and the hours to get out of there.

She didn't know where she would go, but she just needed to be alone, and think of what to do.

"Hi. I brought you something to eat" Arf said upon entering. When she saw the shadow in Nanoha's face, she felt regretful.

"Thanks" she answered reluctantly and trying to smile, but it was more a grimace than a smile.

"How are you?" she knew the answer, but couldn't help to ask.

"Still here, and that's saying something… what happened?" she was in no mood for courtesies or good manners, she needed to know.

"You don't know?"

"Arf, please…" she started to say effortless.

"What did you expected Nanoha?" she didn't want it to sound like a reproach, but deep down it seemed incredible that she didn't know why Fate had left. "Fate has been through this before, she simply wanted to avoid suffering anymore." Nanoha shook her head. "You saw what happened when she saw her damn mother, do you really want her to go through the same with you?"

"I wouldn't hurt her Arf! I'm not Precia" she defended herself.

"I know, but you're married, like her first and second relationship… That was the same problem and therefore her mother accused her of being a sexual psychopath. You _are_ just like all of them, with the same problem…" she argued. Both were silent for a moment. "Nanoha… I know you're not the same to either of the two woman who hurt Fate, but the circumstances are the same…It doesn't matter how much you love her, she could not start a relationship with you while you're married. She can't go back to that, she doesn't want to. You have to understand… the only reason why she let, what happened between you during the weekend, happen was because she knew that was the only way to take you with her, but she couldn't bear to stay and have to be in the shadows, to have you only when Yuuno is not there."

"Not all stories are the same Arf… I… I want to be with her… and only her" at that moment she could no longer hold back the tears in her eyes. "I can't continue with my marriage, Arf… I can't… I love her too much."

Arf wanted to believe her, but she knew Nanoha probably had mixed feelings and that at any moment she might regret what she just said, on the other hand, there was Yuuno, who could convince her to stay with him, after all, the problem wasn't about the lack of love between them, but about the presence of new feelings.

"You don't believe me right?" she said sadly.

"It's not about believing you or not Nanoha, but about what you're _actually_ willing to do… you're life would change completely… nothing would be like it is now…"

"And you think I don't know that?"

"Do you really know?... you'd not only end your marriage Nanoha…you'd change YOUR WHOLE LIFE!"

"I love her… that's all I know" she said.

"If that's true, then fix your situation and then look for her, I'll be the first to help, but if you're not sure, if you have any hint of doubt… let her go…" she stayed silent for a moment, she was aware that the decision that Nanoha had to take was crucial for both of them. "Take your time Nanoha. This is not a decision you should take lightly."

Nanoha had nothing more to say. Arf's words had been clear; it didn't matter what she had to say, only actions mattered, so there was no point on saying and swearing that she loved Fate, if she still wouldn't believe her.

Arf left within minutes, leaving a destroyed Nanoha. Although she understood Fate's decision to leave, she couldn't accept the fact of not seeing her any more, not hearing her, no longer spending everyday with her. She needed her, _loved_ her and that was something she couldn't or wanted to avoid.

Since Acous would be in the city for the whole week and Yuuno had offered him to stay in their house, she thought it best to wait for his departure to talk to Yuuno. What she had to say would change his life too, so she decided to wait until it was only the two of them.

That afternoon, luckily, she had no encounter with Mrs. Precia, so that day she only had to deal with her deep pain and having to pretend like nothing had happened with her husband. However, it wasn't easy, she felt guilty for lying to him like that. It was true, and she had no doubt, that the love she felt for Fate was big and strong, but it wasn't less true that what she felt for Yuuno was still there, at least, when it referred to no wanting to hurt him, so his smiles, receiving warm and loving treatment from him, listening to the plans he sought to implement in the future; they were all like whips hitting her skin and heart. She didn't deserved any of it, and with each passing minute she drowned even more with everything.

On the other hand, Yuuno noticed the change in Nanoha. Her sad and lost looks at times when she thought that he wasn't looking, the muffled sobs before going to sleep and the most painful reality, the fake orgasms and moans when making love. All of them unmistakable signs that their relationship was in danger. During that week he tried his best to surprise her with many details, from giving her chocolates and flowers, to delaying his departure one more week. All desperate attempts to regain the bright and genuine smile on Nanoha's face, yet all of them useless attempts, because nothing made her react.

One evening after work, Nanoha, instead of going home, she went to Arf's house. She needed to be there, she needed to feel close to Fate, even if it was by being in the place where they had lived all those special moments. Arf had given her a copy of the keys, so she didn't have to wait for her to arrive. Being alone allowed her to drain her sadness, her pain. She was able to freely cry, without having to pretend so Yuuno wouldn't notice. She cried lying in Fate's bed, hugging with all her strength, a pillow that sill held her smell.

The ringing of the door bell took her out of her world. At first she thought it was strange, but then a small amount of hope appeared, thinking it could be Fate coming back again, so she ran to the door to open it. When doing so, she found what she least expected, filling her with a burst of rage and jealousy.

"What are you doing here?" she asked coldly.

"I could ask _you_ the same" answered a disturbed Precia. Nanoha expected anything, except for Precia to be there. They stayed silent for a moment. "And… Arf, is she there?"

"She hasn't arrived yet"

Precia understood that Nanoha's presence there was a sign of the closeness she had with Fate and Arf, so she decided to get to the point.

"Then I guess you're with my daughter Fate."

"You guess wrong… Fate is not here either" she leaned over the edge of the door blocking the way.

"So you're alone in Arf's apartment…" she said with some disbelief. "Interesting"

"I don't want to rude, but what are you looking for here?..." she wearily asked. "Or should I say who?"

"Definitely not you" she said smiling.

"That's for sure. What I don't understand is how you even dare to come here"

"I just wanted to say hi" she answered confidently.

"Say hi?" she raised her eyebrows. "After what you did to her?" she couldn't believe what she said.

"And according to you, what did I do?" she didn't doubt that Nanoha was well aware of what had happened with Fate, but she couldn't take it for granted.

"Oh nothing, you just destroyed the life of your own daughter Fate… or at least, you gave it a really good try. Thank God you didn't succeed."

Precia lowered her eyes for a moment. That was not a matter she wanted to discuss in the middle of the hallway, much less with someone who had not been involved in it.

"I don't know how much you know about what happened, but it isn't something I would like to discuss with you."

"Neither would I, but I can't believe you have the nerve to come here as if nothing had happed."

"Am I allowed to come in?" she asked hearing the approaching voices of some neighbors.

Nanoha opened the door reluctantly and motioned her to come in. She did, looking all around her, everything was the same as she remembered it, she then sat on the couch. Nanoha simply stood in front of her.

"Could you give me a glass of water?" she asked softly and without any hint of arrogance, which surprised Nanoha and therefore couldn't refuse. "Thanks" she thanked when receiving it. She took two sips of water and then decided to speak. "I know I did wrong and I'm not proud of it…but I can't change it and I can only try to…"

"Fix it?" she interrupted with an ironic tone.

"Ask for forgiveness" she corrected her. "Nothing can fix what I did" Precia looked at Nanoha in the eyes, and although Nanoha tried to find any hint of lie or falsehood in her eyes, there was none. "There's not a day in which I don't feel miserable and like a coward… in which I don't hate myself for the attitude so low I had… not a day goes by in which I don't see the expression of disappointment and pain of my Fate. That is something that will haunt met me all my life… And although I know I don't deserve her forgiveness, she does deserve to be asked for one… and I came here to… ask for it."

Nanoha had to sit down after hearing that. She didn't know Precia, she only knew about what she had done to Fate, but for what she had seen in the office, she didn't seemed to be the type to lowered her head, much less to ask for forgiveness.

"Why are you telling me this?"

"Because Fate has to know it one way or another. I know Arf wouldn't tell her. But you…"

"I, what?" she asked when seeing that Precia didn't respond.

"I trust you understand that this is important for her… it's important that she knows I'm don't rejoice with happiness for what I did to her… that if could turn back time and prevent all the pain and shame she had to go through… I would do it without hesitation."

"Is it really that important for her… or for you?"

"Nothing will make me feel better, but at least I want to do the right thing… just that."

Nanoha was sure that Fate had long hoped to hear those words, and it was quite an irony that she wasn't there to hear it for herself.

"I would like to wait and talk to her directly… but something tells me she won't be coming soon" Nanoha stayed silent. "I'll be leaving tonight, the only thing that made me stay was the need to talk to her… but it's not possible, so the best I can do is to completely disappear from her life."

Precia got up and walked to the door, but before leaving she turned back to Nanoha.

"Don't do the same as I did… if you love her, don't let fear keep you from doing what's necessary to be with her. I, who am her own mother, abandon her for thinking what people, the society, would say, and with what face would I look at them. Now I just regret that I was selfish and a coward for not accepting her."

So just as she arrived, she left. Nanoha was stunned with what she said, but deep down she thanked her, because she gave her the final push to do what she had to, and not another day would pass without her doing it.

Talking with Yuuno was the hardest thing she had ever done in her life. As expected, he didn't accept it and much less for the reason she was giving him. He didn't understand how she could have fallen in love with a woman and how she could be throwing overboard everything they had built. They were hellish days and nights of discussions and shouting, insulting and complaining. Everything until he finally realized that there was nothing to do, because there was no longer anything to recover.

In making the division of property, they sold the house and car. Yuuno didn't want anything that could remind his of the worst night of his life. With the money, Nanoha rented a modest apartment close to the office and close to Arf, who she visited at least twice a week to hear about Fate.

She didn't want Arf to tell Fate anything about her divorce. She wanted to do it herself, but only until it was a fact. In turn, Arf secretly kept Fate's whereabouts to herself. She didn't want Nanoha to feel tempted to go look for her ahead of time.

During that whole time, Fate stayed in Arf's beach house. She had reached an agreement with her to care for and maintain the house during her stay. She got a job at a sport shop, and from time to time, she offered shuttle service to visit the cays.

She felt at ease, although loneliness caught up to her every night and the need to go back and see Nanoha, at least form the distance, would eat her insides, she had a calm life. On two occasions, she had a close approach with two of the regular customer of the shop, but they were quickly discarded. They weren't Nanoha, and her heart was too attached to her to accommodate a meaningless adventure.

A year had passed since her departure. It was very little what she knew about Nanoha, Arf was very meager when referring to her. She suspected that she didn't want to hurt her by telling her how good she probably was with Yuuno, as it should be, to her misfortune. But she needed o return. Resume her life.

She left the shop later than usual, she did it whenever she could, but this time she did it to slowly begin fixing the unfinished things, before finally leaving. She would leave in a week.

Upon arriving home, she was overcome by excitement when she saw Arf's car parked in the garage. From time to time she appeared without warning, cheering her up for at least a few hours, so she got out of the car as fast as she could and ran into the house. She came in, but didn't see her. She looked in her room but she wasn't there. She thought that maybe she was with some random girl by the beach, so she went downstairs to get some dinner.

She took the bread, cheese and ham out of the fridge to make a sandwich, if it was true that Arf was there with a "friend", it was best to get out of the way to avoid witnessing any uncomfortable scenes. Suddenly a song began to play from the entertainment room.

_You are everything I've ever asked for_

_What my empty soul_

_Wanted to feel._

Fate slightly frowned. It wasn't common of Arf to use such tactics with his romantic conquests.

_You are what I've waited for_

_What I was searching for in my dreams_

_And that I've found in you_

However, she started to wonder if she had finally met someone who inspired her enough to let out her romantic side, so she decided to take a look.

_You've come to light up_

_Every part of my soul_

_Every space of my being_

_I no longer have a heart_

_Or eyes for anyone else_

_Just for you…_

As she approached the room where the music came from, she realized that she didn't hear any voices or anything that indicated Arf's presence. On the other hand, she perceived the sweet floral aroma she remembered so well…

"Nanoha" she whispered.

Her heart began to beat faster. She knew it was crazy even thinking it could be her, but couldn't keep the hope from raising within her.

_You are the love of my life_

_Fate knew it_

_And today it put you before me_

She stepped in the room and found it empty and dark. Only the lights from the stereo broke the intense darkness.

_And every time I look at the past_

_Is how I know that by your side_

_I've always belonged_

She stood in the middle of the room, listening to the song and swallowing every ounce of hope she had. It was absurd that even after so long, she still waited for her.

_You've come to light up_

_Every part of my soul_

_Every space of my being_

_I no longer have a heart_

_Or eyes for anyone else_

_Just for you…_

A pair of hands grabbing her around the waist pulled her out of her thoughts, she wanted to turn around to see who it was, but those hands clung to her, pressing their body against Fate. It only took her seconds to realize that yes, it was her… it was Nanoha!

_Just for you. Just for you_

Fate took the hands and clung to them as well. She didn't understand how it possible that she was there, but she didn't want to ruin the moment, so she just let herself get carried away.

_This is true_

_I can feel it_

_I know that my place_

_Is with you_

Nanoha moved to be face to face with Fate.

_You are everything I've ever asked for_

_What I never knew_

_And I've discovered in you_

"I love you Fate… I love you more than I can say… and I'm here… just for you." she said at the end of the song.

Without waiting any longer, her lips went in search of Fate's. She longed for them, wanted them, loved them.

They merged into an intense hug. They wanted to be a single being and in between tears and smiles, they kissed each other, they caressed each other trying to prove it wasn't a dream and that they were actually there, that it was true that their love remained intact despite the time.

Their clothes didn't last long in their place. Eager hands took them off in their way to glory. The carpet welcomed them, stimulating, with its softness, the sensations in their bodies.

Between kisses and caresses, Fate stopped to look at her for a few minutes. She doubted whether it was true or just a cruel game of her imagination.

"Are you really here?" she asked as she caressed her cheek with her hand. Nanoha nodded. "It isn't a dream?"

Nanoha took Fate's hand and brought it to her lips to kiss each of her fingers.

"I'm here…where I have and want to be… with you"

Fate smiled, but still wasn't sure of what her words meant. Nanoha saw the doubt in her eyes.

"I left him…" she took her face with both hands and got as close as she could so she could see her eyes when talking. "I got divorced. I'm no longer with Yuuno… I'm here with you and for you… today and forever."

What else could she ask for? The smile reached her eyes, the joy took over her heart and peace embraced her soul.

"Honey… there's something I've never told you…" Nanoha looked at her expectantly. "I love you… I love you, I love you, I LOVE YOU!" she shouted with joy.

She kissed her passionately, with need, but also with all the love she had held for so long. They both laughed and hugged tightly. For Fate, saying those words was her freedom and for Nanoha, hearing them, was the confirmation that that was her place.

An immense satisfaction and happiness took over her. The comfort of knowing that this was only the beginning of the rest of their lives. The certainty that they were made for each other. The certainty that it was the beginning of a new life.

Now and forever Nanoha Takamachi and I, Fate Testarossa.

Just for you…

There is no love in peace. It always comes accompanied by agonies, ecstasies, intense joys and deep sorrows. This is "Her and I", a true story… a story of two, who no matter how many walls obstructed their way, they would always fall, and together, they walked hand in hand.

The End

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**A/N: **So it's finally over. What did you think of it, was it good? I really love this story, that's mainly why I wanted to translate it. But anyway please review, it always makes me happy when people comment on the stories. I will be working on translating another story next, it was a request so I'll try and do it as soon a possible, it will be "call of duty" be the infamous21, whose stories I've translated before. Also if anyone had any request of a story they want translated please feel free to PM me or write it on a review. Well thanks for reading this awesome story, and see you on the next one ;)


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